tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-56795851520304166932024-02-02T08:00:15.945-05:00Busy MommySleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.comBlogger623125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-5447769216202158912020-07-02T04:56:00.002-04:002020-07-02T04:56:52.761-04:00Whew...written 4-7-18<br />
Wow!<br />
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It's been a while since I"ve blogged... Crazy fun times around here! :)<br />
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We had a BIG EVENT for our church Friday night. It was awesome!!! All about where we are and what we need to finance our new church building we are building! We were to take a card and pray about a number and donate for the building fund. It was a FANTASTIC awesome night to say the least!!! <br />
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Curt and I have been praying about a number that God wants us to give. We both feel a number, we can't afford. haha... We really can't afford anything because we still have 2 adoption credit card bills we are paying off. God has blessed us and given us what we need each month. But we want to give, and adding it up and looking at our budget and writing it all out, it's not there. Nothing is there! But that's the way it was with adoption! We took that step of faith!<br />
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So that was Friday... Saturday morning went to kettle bell class and I died... I honestly haven't worked out for a week and half. I just couldn't. I wasn't sleeping at nights, and during the afternoon when kids were in "quiet time", I had no energy to even think about working out, or was so busy catching up with things. Got home and then we got the mail. Surprise! A bill. For Ella. For when we went and her new CI mapped and turned on. We both are like, eh, but ok, we are ok, this is fine....<br />
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Saturday afternoon, I got dinner in the oven (Oh, I should mention that I decided after much prayer to do a fast for 2 days and then slowly add certain foods back, so I'm still drinking water at this point... no breakfast, no food in my stomach all day, nothing.)... sat on the couch and Skylar came in screaming and crying. I got her calmed down, but before that she said she broke her arm. I held her arm and took one look and my stomach dropped. There was heat radiating from her wrist and it just looked ugly. Bad.... Very bad.... Curt woke up from his nap to her crying and was a little bit disoriented... He said calm down Skylar, it's not broken... I looked at him and just knew it was. I mouthed, it's bad, its broken. She started crying again, and then Curt got a good look at her wrist and said, oh yeah, she needs to go in. I said, ok, I'll take her, your dinner will be done at 5:20. I had Kotah grab my bed pillow and my shoes and off we went. Thankfully Civista (I know, it's called something else now, but I still call it Civista! ;)) was quick this time! We waited a little bit, but went right to a room in the ER and got X-rays pretty quickly. The first nurse in ER was ok, but the second one was awesome! Then the ER doc said she was calling the ortho doc to come in. He came in and the first words out of his mouth were, I'm sorry, I was pumping gas when I got the call and I spilled some gas on me, so I'm very sorry for smelling like gas. Then he said, honestly I don't remember everything he said, but to sum it up, we can do surgery, but can't do it tonight, because it isn't an emergency surgery, I can't call a team in at 11 at night... I would snap her wrist into place, and then put a pin in there to hold it. Put a cast on it for 4 weeks and then take the pin out. Taking pins out is easy and am told that most people prefer to have a pin out than stitches or staples. We do it right in the office. OR I could inject a numbing gel and then pop it back into place and put it in a splint. But there is a 20% chance that it could pop back out of place, and I would have to do surgery to re-break it and then put the pins in. So I said I need to call my hubs and he said absolutely.. He left the room and I called Curt. We both thought and felt at peace to do the surgery. But that meant being admitted and doing it first thing in the morning. He came back in and told him we will do surgery. He looked very relieved. He said I don't know if I should say this or not, but I'm very uneasy about popping it back into place while they are awake. I always go home wondering if I did the right thing, and how much they will remember, how bad did it hurt them... I said well, it just shows you really care for you patients and I really appreciate your honesty. He left and another nurse came in to give her an iv... Thankfully she had a vein that was showing and got it in one poke and didn't have to dig around. Her ER nurse stayed and he kept talking to her and showing her his scars from broken bones, even where he broke his wrist too. I prayed with her during it and she was great! She cried and shed a few tears, but it didn't last long at all! ER nurse wheeled her up to her room and gave her a sucker. She was pretty excited about that! She was hungry!!!! ;) The nurses up there that night were awesome as well! They kept saying how great she's doing and everything! Oh, after the ortho doc left, the ER nurse and another one came in a put her wrist in a splint. After that she was feeling a little more comfy. They also gave her some Motrin. Curt got a friend to stay with the kids so he could come give us a few things and some supper for Skylar. He also brought 2 bananas, and I ate one. I broke my fast, I needed some food. ;)<br />
She was in some more pain so they gave her the good tylenol with codeine in it. She slept from 11 to 4 when they came in to get vitals. They also got her at 7:40 for surgery and was in OR by 8 am. The anesthesiologist was very nice and awesome too! He told her he broke his face by riding his bike, crashed! Skylar looked over at me and said, OUCH mom. He came out after she was out and said she did fantastic! She didn't flip out in OR, she was very calm and cool. The Ortho Doc said she was very heroic. He's never seen a kid so cool and calm. I said many people were and are praying for her, and she is pretty tough and brave! He popped her wrist back into place and put 2 pins in there to help it. She has a white cast with a cut on the top and bottom. He does that to help with swelling. He always did it and then no one complained of swelling so he stopped, up til a week ago when he had a boy that swelled and he had to re-do it all. So... he decided to do it again. Then there is a white ACE bandage over it all.<br />
Back up to her room then for a bit more recovery. Done in the recovery room she had I think 3 doses of morphine. She was extra groggy and doesn't remember it. The one thing she said to me once she saw me walk into the room, she said, you were right mom, I didn't feel a thing! I said yep, I glad you didn't! Then she was out again! All the OR nurses were awesome as well! They kept saying how awesome and brave and cute and adorable she is.<br />
Curt and the kids stopped off after church, and she was just getting her food tray. Still waking up from her grogginess. She ate a bit, but made her stay in bed for a bit before I helped get her dressed to go home. I signed all the discharge papers before Curt and kids left then. So all I had to do was get her dressed and we were free!<br />
Got to the bathroom and got her dressed and I saw the color drain from her face and thought oh no. Yep, she got sick. :( I asked her if she wanted to stay a bit longer and she said no I want to go home now. I said ok, do NOT tell the nurse you just got sick ok? I know it's lying, but it's from all the morphine they gave you and then eating and getting up. I am sure you won't get sick again, ok? She said ok, let me push the button to call nurse to go home.<br />
Got home and she was in and out the rest of the day.<br />
I fell asleep on the floor and was in and out for a few hours.<br />
The Farmer Family ordered Pizza Hut for us because she knows me too well. The Treadway family came over and brought some balloons and visited for a bit that evening then too.<br />
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Now to today, Monday... Was out of it and didn't sleep so well. Skylar made it til about 5am and asked for some pain pills and since then, she's been asking at every 4 hours to get more. She said it hurts where the pins are. She was up a bit but down too. <br />
Had to go get Thads new lenses... Bifocals... To say it went awesome would be a lie. I'm not seeing results, infact seeing it worse. But it is only the first few hours.. It can change. Praying this dude doesn't need surgery as well... But God has it all under control and I give it to Him.<br />
Curt is traveling with his boss, so he is gone. Let the kiddos watch a movie and by the time it started Thad was doing better with them. Will see how tomorrow goes. It is a huge adjustment. It's VERY obvious he has them too! I won't lie, I bribed him to wear them. I said if you wear them I will let you watch a movie tonight. He kept them on. He asked if he could pick one out, but I said let's let Skylar pick it out tonight ok? We may be watching another one tomorrow night.... ;)<br />
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I was completely out of it today. I got one load of laundry done and my house. Oy, my house. I know, house isn't important, but it's a mess. Everywhere. Not just one room, but all rooms.<br />
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Satan is def attacking me, and my family.<br />
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We were praying and asking God how much He wants us to give, we have trust and faith in Him because we don't have hardly any extra money as is, and now, with that insurance bill from Ella, we know one is coming for XJ's visit as well... Then with this ER trip that turned into being admitted which turned into surgery... I'm feeling completely, I don't want to say overwhelmed because I don't. I feel out of it and tired. But yet I'm fully trusting God and letting Him comfort me. I've done enough crying tonight to last me awhile! haha<br />
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I can truly feel God and His presence. I know without a doubt He is here. At times like this, I know He is giving me WAAAAY more than I can handle... on my own that is. But with Him, wow. With Him, ANYTHING and everything is possible! I always dislike it when people say He won't give you more than you can handle, its a LIE. Of course He is going to give you more than you can handle! HELLO?!?! I have SIX kids, 2 whom are special needs, all whom I homeschool! And now this on top of it! I'm just glad I know He is there, and not only there, He is loving, He is present, He is faithful, He is just, He is my comforter, He is my rock, He is our provider... I could go on and on. Times when it gets tough, you just need to let Him comfort you. You need to lay back and rest in His arms. His HUGE strong arms, but yet gentle arms.<br />
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Love this song by Rend Collective.. it's a newer one...<br />
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My Lighthouse<br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">In my wrestling and in my doubts</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">In my failures You won't walk out</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">Your great love will lead me through</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">You are the peace in my troubled sea</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">You are the peace in my troubled sea</span><br />
<br style="background-color: #ccccdd; border: 0px none; font-family: Verdana, Arial; font-size: 13px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">In the silence, You won't let go</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">In my questions, Your truth will hold</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">Your great love will lead me through</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">You are the peace in my troubled sea</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">You are the peace in my troubled sea</span><br />
<br style="background-color: #ccccdd; border: 0px none; font-family: Verdana, Arial; font-size: 13px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">My Lighthouse, my lighthouse</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">Shining in the darkness, I will follow You</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">My Lighthouse, my Lighthouse</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">I will trust the promise, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">You will carry me safe to shore (Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">Safe to shore (Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">Safe to shore (Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">Safe to shore</span><br />
<br style="background-color: #ccccdd; border: 0px none; font-family: Verdana, Arial; font-size: 13px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">I won't fear what tomorrow brings</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">With each morning I'll rise and sing</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">My God's love will lead me through</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">You are the peace in my troubled sea</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">You are the peace in my troubled sea</span><br />
<br style="background-color: #ccccdd; border: 0px none; font-family: Verdana, Arial; font-size: 13px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">Fire before us, You're the brightest</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #ccccdd; font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">You will lead us through the storms</span><br />
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He won't let go. He is the peace in my troubled sea.<br />
His love will lead us through.<br />
I will trust the promise.<br />
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I'm not complaining, just catching up, trying to write what's on my heart. It may be tired and weak, but I know that God is here and faithful! There are others who are going through so much more than what I am, I have no reason to complain. <br />
This is my season right now. God has placed me here at this moment for a reason. I don't know why, and I may never fully understand. I may never understand why the bad things happen to us or my kids, but I do know that i can fully trust Him to provide, protect, love, and comfort me.<br />
Someone asked me if I could change anything about my life right now, what would it be. I think they wanted a different answer, but I gave them this:<br />
I wouldn't change anything. Yes, we may have some months where it's paycheck to paycheck, or there are trials and hurts that i don't want to see happen. But I know that God has me here right at this moment for a reason and I will trust Him and in Him with my life and everything. So I don't want to change anything about my life or my season right now. He has me here for a reason and no matter what comes my way, I trust in Him.<br />
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<br />Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-89079977466520109182020-07-02T04:56:00.000-04:002020-07-02T04:58:29.633-04:00Ramblings... ;)written 1-2017<br />
Don't know where this blog post will end up, so just fair warning! :)<br />
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Went home to Indiana for Christmas. We left JUST before the super bad weather hit them, as in the NEGATIVE 45 degree weather! We were just in front of the storm til Ohio, then we were free and clear! It only took us just over 9 hours to get there and get back home! Which is WONDERFUL!!! We also packed one meal and ate in van.</div>
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Ella had her check up that I was DREADING..... Dr Reilly is awesome! Seriously! Told him that we were having issues AGAIN with speech and trying to get that all worked out! It has been crazy! They had a speech therapy back in JULY, and we got 4 bills from the 2 sessions, which is supposed to be covered. Dr Reilly and his team got involved and got it all settled. It took 7 months, but it got taken care of. ;) Our speech therapist called insurance to make sure it was covered so we wouldn't get more bills and found out that it isn't! So, once again dealing with that to see what's going on. Crazy!</div>
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Anyways, back to appointment. He asked if we wanted to have her implanted in the other side. I said yes, but we can't afford it, prob not this year. I told him we desperately need a roof, infact we should've had it done last year, but couldn't afford it with the medical bills. We have many leaks and need it replaced! ;) He then said, oh absolutely, a roof is way more important, She has one that is working great. So I left feeling good, even though I was dreading the visit. Also as we left, he said to let him know if they need to get involved in the insurance issue again... This doc has gone above and beyond and grateful that he is our kids ear doc!</div>
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Been working on school work with the kids. The younger 3 honestly is a hit and miss, but working as much as I can with XJ. He has glasses and it seems to help a LOT! He isn't tripping over his feet nearly as much! The poor kid couldn't see!!! He is still working on colors, but other things are going better with signing! If he wants more of something I make them both tell me what it is. If I know they don't know what it is, I will tell them at the beginning before they eat. He is getting much better at remembering, or if I show him once he usually gets it now. Before he would be in tears bc he wouldn't remember or he wouldn't focus. You may think I am mean and make them ask me what they want, but they need to learn. AND I am not starving my kids. They get a full plate of food and it's for seconds that I make them ask.</div>
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MSD is done with their in home visits and honestly am relieved. I did not connect with the teachers. They didn't teach Ella (or the rest of us) new signs. It was a come here, read a book and color a pic, but it wasn't anything new or challenge. </div>
Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-20865796643013062502018-03-15T17:34:00.001-04:002018-03-15T17:34:12.023-04:00Judah's Wife Book ReviewI received this book from Bethany House for free if I agreed to read and then blog about it.<br />
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Judah's Wife is by Angela Hunt.<br />
I've read a few of her books and absolutely enjoyed and loved them! I was very excited to be picked to read this book!<br />
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I've honestly not read anything from the books of Maccabees. This story is the "silent years' between Malachi and Matthew. I really would like find Maccabees now to read it since I've read this book.<br />
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This book was amazing!<br />
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Love being able to read stories that really capture what it was like. Angela Hunt has done this in this book.<br />
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I really enjoyed how she told it from Judah's side and Leahs side. It would go back and forth, but it wasn't confusing at all. Talks about Leahs up-bringing and how she struggled. Her father wasn't a real father figure and in time she realizes how much her mother protected her from her father and his blows. She struggles to truly love Judah at first who was somewhat forced to marry someone before they moved. <br />
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Leah got thrust into a marriage, a move away from anything she knows, and has a hard time trusting Judah. But what she doesn't see at first is how much Judah loves her, but not only that, how much God loves her.<br />
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She grows to truly love Judah and trust him, but it came at costs.<br />
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Judah becomes a leader that Leah isn't too excited about. He is a warrior and is leading the army that fights in many battles and wins because God is on their side. Leah isn't excited about his role as warrior because her father always liked to fight and she wasn't for the violence.<br />
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In time she understands what God has called Judah to do. She also learns to fully trust Judah and understand what it's like to be truly loved. Not only by Judah, but God.<br />
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Now that comes with hardships, but she learns to trust and have the courage she needs.<br />
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This book really captures what I feel it was like for both Judah and Leah, even with not having read the Books of Maccabees.<br />
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The ending, I won't spoil it for you, but it was hard to read. But it was a great ending.<br />
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I recommend this book, and if anyone local wants to borrow it, I've got it for you to borrow! :)<br />
<br />Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-77349962921259753112017-09-05T14:22:00.001-04:002017-09-05T14:22:19.575-04:00Quick Tips for Busy Families ReviewI signed up to be a review blogger for Bethany House books. I did not pay for this book. I got it for free if I would agree to read it, blog it and write a review and post it!<br />
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This book is called Quick Tips For Busy Families by Jay Payleitner.<br />
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Honestly I wasn't too sure about this book at first, but I found quite a few ideas in this book! I thought we are busy, but we aren't "that" busy, are we? But in this day, everyone I believe is busy and if there are some good tips, I am gonna try them! Some of them we actually have done before! Nice to know I'm not the only one who has done some of them too!<br />
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What I liked about this book is that it is Christian based. He takes those ideas and has a Christian perspective. Not always easy finding a good, funny, Christian based book. You will be laughing and rolling your eyes thinking, yep, that has happened, or no that hasn't happened, but I see that happening. to getting to the serious and important topics. He has a way with writing that makes you think, but it isn't to heavy.<br />
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A couple of my favorites one are:<br />
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Twenty-one Things to Write on a Sticky Note<br />
Make Room in the Fridge<br />
Clean Stuff Besides Dishes in the Dishwasher (Which was a very good reminder for me!)<br />
Be Smart With Smartphone Photos<br />
Keep Reading Out Loud<br />
Be Their Favorite Critic<br />
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There are more, but these are the few that really stand out!<br />
For those of you who are local, you can borrow my book, but but I guarantee, this is one you will want to have on your bookshelf. This is definitely a book to keep and have around, not just for now, but for later... Even when your kids are grown up and have kids... ;)Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-21487369337319596542016-12-17T22:09:00.003-05:002016-12-17T22:09:51.162-05:00Miscarried JoyI signed up to receive books for free, and in return, blog about them... Whether good or bad! :) And this is one of those books!<br />
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I saw the title of this one, and knew I had to check it out! After having 2 miscarriages, and no one seems to talk about it. Or more like, you don't hear about it until you have one. Why is this not talked about?<br />
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This book was a good read. Hard at times because I have been through it and felt a lot of what Tanika had gone through. Now, I hadn't gone through everything she did, but still.<br />
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It was a comfort to read and know that all the emotions and thoughts, and even angry is ok. My first one I lost was 13 years ago. I was very mad at God, and I questioned Him. The second one, still, very hard to go through because it was completely different than my first (long story, and if any one wants to know it, I'll share it.... I ended up in ER losing my baby naturally.... Had a D&C for my first one... and actually still needed one after my second... again, long story!) but I knew that God had me and had everything in control.<br />
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This book brought me to tears and even laughter. It is a must read for anyone that has gone through a miscarriage. I love the fact that she put scripture all throughout the book! How she talks about that God is still there!<br />
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Here are some quotes from Tanika that I really liked:<br />
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The blessings that come without challenges sometimes aren't appreciated as much as those that arrive after a struggle.<br />
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(wow. Talk about a blow. But a good one! I feel like applies to life in general, not just after misacrage)<br />
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God doesn't work according to our time. He works according to when we are ready to receive the blessing that He has stored up for us.<br />
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If you allow God to privately develop you, He will publicly bless you.<br />
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Our brokenness has a tendency to prevent us from seeing what God is building is our lives.<br />
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These really hit home. Now I have had a baby since my last miscarriage, but truly enjoyed and was able to grieve more over my babies that are in heaven right now. I will also be sharing this with my friends that I know have gone through this recently and in the past. I feel that this book will really help them. We aren't alone and I feel more ladies need to know that! They need to know that God is with us, no matter what. They need to read this book and be reassured of His awesomeness and His timing and His love for us.<br />
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We all go through a time of not really being patient, it is so very hard. Especially when you are talking about having a baby. She also talks about and has scripture about how to be patient, and she herself is being patient, and CLAIMING that baby. Love the prayer at the end and how to claim that child as your own. <br />
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Thank you for opening up and being willing to write what you have gone through so others can be assured that they aren't alone. It can be a very dark and scary and lonely time, but God is ever so good and faithful!<br />
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<br />Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-90039272483407587982015-08-25T20:34:00.002-04:002015-08-25T20:34:50.689-04:00God's Plan, Not MineThankfully God knows what He is doing... Because I'm a little confused. Was upset and frustrated this morning to be honest.<br />
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Baby number 7 is due Sept 1. Found out last Tuesday that this lil one is breech... Had an ultrasound on Wednesday at Milford to confirm for sure, and then another doc appt on Thursday for options.<br />
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Option 1 would be they would've taken me in last Friday or Saturday (the 21st or 22nd) and try to turn baby. If baby turned or even if didn't, and everything was ok, I would've been sent home to wait it out. If something happened, I would need emergency c-section.<br />
Option 2 schedule c-section at 39 weeks or after.<br />
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I was not very comfortable with the first option, so I scheduled it. They got me in today, exactly 39 weeks.<br />
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Finally got the call the night before to find out what time I was scheduled for. All ready to go, at peace, not nervous, and ready! This kid has been laying the wrong way and it has just been painful. Not trying to complain, but being honest. :)<br />
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Got to Kent and go through EVERYTHING, 2 bags of IV fluids, all the docs and nurses coming in and talking about what will happen, how they do the spinal, everything. Up to the point of them about giving me the little 1 oz drink to help with the acid in my stomach from the c-section. They get the sonogram machine and the doc looks for the head. But the head it not where it was last Wednesday... The baby's head is down and no longer breech! (not engaged, but down) So guess what that means? I go home. They won't induce me, I'm 39 weeks, I wanted to be induced. I was ready to have this baby.<br />
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The frustrating part for me was getting me all ready to go and then do the ultrasound... Why not do that first? I'm in the 5%- FIVE PERCENT- of ladies whose babies turn. Baby could turn back, but for now, I just wait.<br />
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I'm still barely at 2 cm and 50% effaced, which I have been since 37 weeks.<br />
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I had a few hours this afternoon to myself while the kids were playing and just sat and rested and prayed.<br />
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I know without a doubt that God has this! HE has me through everything! No matter what happens. I will continue to praise Him no matter what! I was just having a human moment and not liking what was going on. I also had the thought that my old doc in MD would've let me be induced at 39 weeks, so I was frustrated that they were letting me go.<br />
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I understand and know surgery would be harder and recovery would be longer and harder. I know that God is protecting me and this babe. Who is very stubborn... Takes after his/her father for sure, because we all know I am not stubborn... ;) haha<br />
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So while still tonight I'm slightly disappointed that there is still no baby and I was sent home, I will praise Him. I will continue to trust in and on Him and know that He has brought me this far, so I know He has me and He won't leave me. I don't always understand why things happen, or the way things happen, but I know that He is in control! I deep down wasn't excited about c-section, never having one, I didn't really want my last one to be that way, but was ok with it.<br />
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I have a doc appt Thursday morn, and will go from there... Now I'm praying that they will induce me at 40 weeks since my mom will be here for sure. If I go into labor on my own, I'm praying it isn't the middle of the night! ;)<br />
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Oh and no, I didn't feel any extra movement for when this babe turned. The nurse asked me and even the doc and I said no, I didn't feel anything extra. Just the typical in consistent contractions and an elbow here and there. But no extra hard movement or jumping around. I have NO clue when this babe decided to turn!<br />
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God has had His in this pregnancy and continues to have His hand in it. He does have a sense of humor...<br />
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Never a dull moment in the Cecil house... ;)<br />
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Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-43468528467956244152015-08-25T20:06:00.000-04:002015-08-25T20:06:14.325-04:00God's Plan...<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Ever been down one path that you think you are supposed to be on, and then God says, Hey, let's wait a bit for that path, I need you to go down this one instead first?</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Yeah, that would be me. A year ago in June I had a friend come over because she wanted me to pray for her. I prayed over her and her family, and other things. She then prayed for me, she then squeezed my hands and said God I don't want to say this but everytime I keep pushing it back you keep pushing it more. Please bless Mandy and open her womb and bless the baby she will give birth too.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">As soon as she said those words I felt the holy spirit move in me, in my womb. It was like nothing I've ever experienced before.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">She very quickly said amen, and ran out the door.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I was alone. Curt was away on a missions trip with his work.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I wrestled with God that night, wrestled. I kept saying God, this wasn't the plan, we are supposed to adopt or foster to adopt, or both. There are so many kids out there that need a home, and I want to give them a home. remember God, one less? </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">As if I needed to remind God about the one less? He clearly knows what He is doing right?</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Every time I said God, He kept saying, Trust Me, I've got this, you need to trust Me.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Finally by the time the sun came up, I gave up. I threw my hands up in the air and said, ok, God, fine. But You've gotta convince my husband, he will laugh at me.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Hubby got home later on Saturday and after hearing all about his stories and his trip I told him what happened. He laughed, which I knew he would, because I was still thinking I don't know about this.... We talked and prayed about it...</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Almost a year later and we find out we are expecting in January. :)</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I went through some appointments because the doc thought the baby was measuring small... Finally saw the heartbeat and measuring at 6 weeks, breathe a sigh of relief. Then got another call that I needed another ultrasound because he was concerned. I went for my u/s on 6-10 at the imagining center in Waldorf. She kept asking me questions and I didn't see the screen, so I knew something wasn't right. Then when she said, I'm going to go get the doctor and will be right back. Then I knew I lost the baby for sure because I've never seen their doc. He confirmed and said he was very sorry. Then they asked me to wait in the waiting room so they could call my doc. That wasn't so fun. It was starting to register and the tears were starting to fall. Finally my doc called me and I asked the lady up front if I could leave since they called me. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I left, grabbed my kids from my friends house, then headed home. Curt was supposed to be gone all week, but he was on his way home.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Love my friends, they had food all lined up for the week for us. It was a huge blessing to not have to worry about dinners.... </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Wednesday I had an appt with my doc who did an u/s and I got to see the lifeless limp baby, who looked even smaller than it did a week ago when i had seen the heartbeat. He asked if I wanted a D&C or the pill, which he didn't fully recommend because it causes more cramping and more painful. I said no to the pill but wanted to talk to my hubs about the D&C before I scheduled it. He said ok, call us back and ask for so and so.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Went home talked and prayed and called the office back to schedule the D&C. i waited all day. Never got a call back. So I tried again the next day at 8:15, 15 minutes after they open. Waited all day, never got the call back either. So Friday rolls around and I'm too upset and tired to call them yet again. I figured after 2 days, they should be calling me back.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Thankfully my mom was planning on coming this week-end anyways before she went to my brothers house. She got here late Friday night.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Saturday I'm starting to cramp. Sunday a little worse... Went to church, and feel ok...</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">About 4pm it started. Don't wanna gross you out but I passed the baby, and kept bleeding. I thought I was going to be done. Nope... At 8 I asked Curt to take me to the ER because I didn't think this was right to be losing this much blood. The ER was really busy and as I posted there was family there that had lost their little toddler. Such heartbreaking news... Kept praying for the family. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Finally got in and had my blood taken.. I saw 4 tubes and said oh man, 4 tubes? he said oh good, thanks for reminding me, you need 5. I told him, I may pass out on you, I've lost so much blood already.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I got to tube 3 and said ok, not feeling good. So he let me lay down and he finished up the other 2 tubes. I had to get up to the bathroom, so after laying there for a bit, I went to get up. Made it to the bathroom door, and sat on the ground. I looked at Curt and said, I am sorry hun, I can't do this, and then I flopped over. I remember coming too for 2-3 seconds and then back out. They got a full iv bag in me in about 10 minutes. I was extremely dehydrated. Lost alot of blood and blood clots the size of ping pong balls. I was in the bathroom every 7 minutes, literally... When they hooked me up to heart monitor and blood pressure it was 73 over 59 for blood pressure and heart rate was around 110...</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I got back to an ER room and had a cervix exam which the doc said I was over the hard part and should be better. May still pass a few things, but it would be ok and not to worry. She said it was "normal" to lose all that blood and the clots when having a miscarriage naturally. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Had a follow up with my doc with the next day and my doc wasn't there, he had an emergency c-section, so I saw the PA. She did an exam and an u/s and said that I still had a thick lining so I needed to have a D&C. So I looked at her and said because your office failed to call me back I went through crap last night and still have to go through with this? Again, twice? She apologized, but I couldn't hear it, or accept it. I was honestly way too upset. The night in the ER and what I went through at home was NOT what I wanted to go through. Yes, I was at peace if it happened that way, but not my choice. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">She then gave my 800 mg ibprophen and one antibiotic to take 12 hours after the surgery to fill that day so I wouldn't have to do it on the way home from surgery. I got in the next day to have it done.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Got to the hospital and was cramping and had a major head-ache. Doc came in and asked how I was and told him, then he asked if I got my scripts filled. Since we had gone there before going to hospital, I said yes, and we showed him. He then said, oh, um, only one antibiotic? I said yes, she told me to take it 12 hours after surgery. he said no, you need a week of that, not just one. Plus you need another one to keep your cervix closed.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">So I clam up, I'm mad. Not only did I waste our time going to get the scripts filled before surgery, we have to go AFTER now to get them, and the PA didn't know what she was doing. He gets them written out and he goes, and the nurses come back in and get me ready.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Part of my didn't want to the D&C because I had one 11ish yrs ago. I can tell you EVERYTHING they said and did and what I said and did. I thought it was a curse that I remembered what happened. I used to get nightmares about that day. I went into deep depression with that miscarriage. I was not as close to God as I am now, nor was my faith as strong. Don't get me wrong, I've still got growing to do. We all do if we are honest. Everyday is growing closer to Him. But then, I hated Him. It was bad. This time, I was praising Him. Yes, it hurt and it still does, but I know without a doubt that God has this. I don't know what His plan is. But I have told Him, use me no matter the cost. This was big. I don't know how He is going to use this, and honestly, I'm totally ok with that. Just knowing that He has me and knowing that I can lean into Him, and let Him comfort me. To give Him all the praise even when it's hard. And it has been. Recovery for this one is NOT fun. A nurse friend told me that since I lost that much blood that it could take me 4-6 weeks for recovery. GAH???!!!! WHAT????!!!!!! My legs hurt, they need to be stretched, but when I try, I'm moving more than I should be, and so I bleed more. It's a lose lose right now... haha... But again, I'm giving it to God. He has it. He has this all under control. I may not like what's going on, but I have faith in Him. I still have cramping and the raw scrapped feeling, I don't like that feeling. Thankfully it's not all the time consistent, but it was. It still hurts. The 800 mg ibprohpen doesn't do anything for the pain. It's not helping the head-aches I've been getting either. I also got Vicodin from the ER, that didn't do anything either, and I took 2.... (Only b/c my nurse friend said I could!!!)</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Oh, that was the other thing, I was at the Target pharmacy 3 times within 2 days, the pharmacist there made sure I wasn't taking certain drugs together that they kept prescribing me b/c they don't mix. Hmm, the doc didn't notice what he was giving me, or didn't pay attention to the drugs I already had? </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Anyways.... It doesn't matter at what point you lose you baby, it's still painful. It hurts. It doesn't make any sense to me. But I don't have to understand why? I just have to have faith and trust that God is in control! And He is. Thankfully! ;) I'm still going to have some hard days. I may just start crying. That's ok. Grieving sucks sometimes. There really is no warning as to WHEN it will happen. But if you see me start to cry, either ignore me, or give me a hug. I may not even know WHY I'm crying. ;)</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Thank you to all who have sent encouraging notes and letters and messages, and those of you that helped with food. You are a blessing and I am so blessed to have you all in my life. Those meals where amazing and wonderful, more help than you know!</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Many of you asked if you could help, and right now, I don't know how. We are ok. But I won't turn down a meal... ;)</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I'm still so weak and tired and just made a super easy dinner tonight of tuna. (BLAH, but I ATE it.. protein...) It took me long enough to make it because I kept sitting down, or I sat down to mix it up. Kotah and Gavin have been a HUGE help, but was trying to let them be tonight. Curt took off all last week, but is back to working this week, and at an overnight church conference right now. Trying to drink lots of water and one vitamin water a day... Trying to eat, but not hungry, or when I do eat, I can't eat much because I get full. But will get there! Keep looking at my kettlebells and want to get back to that, but just can't. not allowed to do much of anything for atleast another 2 weeks.... Going to call and make a followup appt and then after that, I'm done with this doc. My heart is softening a teeny tiny bit for forgiving them, but still not fully. I know you are supposed to forgive, but right now, I can't fully. I pray by the time I have to go back in and I talk to him, that I will be able too.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">A few songs that have really popped out at me... There are more, but here's a few... Love the lyrics.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Your Hands- JJ Heller</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I have unanswered prayers<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />I have trouble I wish wasn't there<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />And I have asked a thousand ways<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />That you would take my pain away<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />You would take my pain away<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" /><br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />I am trying to understand<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />How to walk this weary land<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />Make straight the paths that crooked lie<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />Oh Lord, before these feet of mine<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />Oh Lord, before these feet of mine<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" /><br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />When my world is shaking, heaven stands<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />When my heart is breaking <br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />I never leave your hands<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" /><br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />When you walked upon the earth<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />You healed the broken, lost and hurt<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />I know you hate to see me cry<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />One day you will set all things right<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />Yeah, one day you will set all things right<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" /><br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />When my world is shaking, heaven stands<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />When my heart is breaking <br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />I never leave your hands<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" /><br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />Your hands that shaped the world<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />Are holding me<br style="border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" />They hold me still</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Nothing Holding Me Back-</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Now nothing is holding me back from You<br />Redeemer of my soul<br />Now nothing can hold me back from You<br />Your Love will never let me go</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Verse 2<br />Thank You for Your death and resurrection<br />Thank You for the power of Your blood<br />I am overwhelmed by Your affection<br />The Kindness and the Greatness of Your Love<br />The Kindness and the Greatness of Your Love</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Verse 3<br />Thank You that we’re living in Your Kingdom<br />Jesus You’re the King upon the throne<br />Thank You for the way You always love me<br />Now I get to love You in return<br />Now I get to love You in return</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Bridge<br />Jesus, You make all things new</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Praise Like Fireworks- Rend Collective</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">I lift my voice to praise You</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">I lift my voice to praise You</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">My concrete heart won't stop me</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">My concrete heart won't stop me</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">I'll sing like it's the first time</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">I'll sing like it's the first time</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">And leave behind the cynic</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">I leave behind the cynic in my soul</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">We're letting praise like fireworks</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">Loose from our thankful hearts</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">We're bringing You our praise, bringing You our lives</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">We're bringing You our praise, bringing You our lives</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">We're bringing You our praise, bringing all our lives to You</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">Through joy and pain we worship</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">Through joy and pain we worship</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">With heart and soul wide open</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">With heart and soul wide open</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">Your strength will never fail us</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">Your strength will never fail us</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">We're not lost in the darkness</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">We're not lost in the darkness</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">You are here</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; line-height: normal; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">The Broken Beautiful-</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">That Your love will never change,<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />that there's healing in your name<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />That You can take broken things,<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />and make them beautiful<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />You took my shame<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />And You walked out of the grave<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />So Your love can take broken things<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />and make them beautiful</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I'm better off when I begin to remember<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />How You have met me in my deepest pain<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />So give me glimpses now of how You have covered<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />All of my heart ache, oh with all Your grace<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />Remind me now that You can make a way</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">That Your love will never change,<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />that there's healing in your name<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />That You can take broken things,<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />and make them beautiful<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />You took my shame<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />And You walked out of the grave<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />So Your love can take broken things<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />and make them beautiful</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">You say that You'll turn my weeping into dancing<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />Remove my sadness & cover me with joy<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />You say your scars are the evidence of healing<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />That You can make the broken beautiful</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">You make us beautiful, oh oh<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />You make us beautiful</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">The pain will not define us</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">Joy will reignite us</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">You're the song</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">You're the song</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">Of our hearts</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">The dark is just a canvas</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">For Your grace and brightness</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">You're the song</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">You're the song</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">Of our hearts</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">We're dancing to the rhythm of Your heart</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">We're rising from the ashes to the stars</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">You're the joy joy joy lighting my soul</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">The joy joy joy making me whole</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">Though I'm broken, I am running</span><br style="border: 0px none; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" /><span style="line-height: normal; text-align: center;">Into Your arms of love</span></span></span></div>
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Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-26950479505868880882013-12-10T10:22:00.000-05:002013-12-10T10:22:04.906-05:00Changes<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Just keep thinking about this picture I took when we were in China.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Take a good close look.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqeFkPckdHYHqbzy5mliLfA9ZzHNj33sq9xAu7r6G2p7mQmercKxNVgDz6gEyh1DudLgi6GQFoCKNsMxP1oAapBSLkcOeDk4l-EgK1HuEJEJjox-aJz0k-CqaV7CHkPeKgVaNNlsDR76o/s640/blogger-image-96734525.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqeFkPckdHYHqbzy5mliLfA9ZzHNj33sq9xAu7r6G2p7mQmercKxNVgDz6gEyh1DudLgi6GQFoCKNsMxP1oAapBSLkcOeDk4l-EgK1HuEJEJjox-aJz0k-CqaV7CHkPeKgVaNNlsDR76o/s640/blogger-image-96734525.jpg" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Do you see it? It's kinda gradual, but it's there.<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">One lady is dressed in the "traditional" old Chinese clothing.... Then the middle one is dressed a little bit more "modern", while the last "girl" is wearing short shorts and belly tight shirt.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">When we were there we saw all three types of dress. The younger generation was wearing more "modern" clothing. It didn't match, and their shoes, holy cannoli, their SHOES!!!! Never have I seen sooooo many types of DIFFERENT shoes!! Even the MEN! ;) Anyways, getting off point here...</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">And I am not posting this to get an argument on what I define as older, and what "traditional" clothing is. I really could care less what you wear (but I won't agree with the skimpy clothing, but am NOT judging you!!!!), but my point is on change. It changes over time. Lots of things change over time.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Not just our clothing, but our time, we want things faster, and better, and clearer, and our food, same thing.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">But what about our time with God. Has that changed? Do you now not have time for Him and your devos? What about working out? Do you find the time for that too?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Since we want things NOW, and we are always in such a hurry, do we really take that time we need to SIT down and FOCUS on HIM?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">What is your devotion time look like with Him? Do you do it first thing in the morning? Or last thing at night? I don't care when you do it, as long as you do it. You NEED to find the time, or even schedule time to do your devos. Not only that, but your work out. I believe that you can't only just Spiritually feed your body, but you need to physically feed your body. You do that by working out and watching what you eat.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">What is taking up your time?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">How often are you on Face Book? Or watching a football game? Or going to a football game? Or playing Candy Crush, or whatever the latest game is? ;) or sitting on the couch watching a movie?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I'm not here pointing fingers at ANYONE! And before you go saying, well that't not me! I don't play Candy Crush, or I don't like Football.... I'm to blame just as much as anyone else. At night after a long day of watching my littles, teaching them something, or so I hope I'm teaching them something, breaking up a fight between one or two or three or all six of them, getting one off the couch before they do a double back flip onto a pile of pillows on the floor, chase them before they run away, stepping on those nasty little tiny Legos, feeding them THREE meals a day, etc etc etc... I get it, you are tired at the end of the night. And you are tired when you wake up. But I can guarantee you if you would set your alarm for even 15 minutes earlier, read some scriptures and even start small with a workout, your day will go so much better!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Start off small, like lunges, or squats, yoga, or my personally fav is the kettle bell. You can do all kinds of AMAZING workouts with just a tiny kettle bell! And start off with a size (weight) that is good for you! Anywhere from 5 lbs to 200 lbs! Just START! :)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I've been setting my alarm for 5:30-5:45am. I get up, work out, then I do my devos and spend time in alone quiet prayer with God. Ok, so some days it's not fully alone, but it's still what I need to start my day! (My kids aren't supposed to come downstairs until 7am, but sometimes they come down a little sooner. But they also know they need to leave me alone until I am done with my devos.) Get a workout on and done, do my devos, pray, do facebook, and move on to making breakfast. I can't tell you how much better my day goes! BUT I will tell you if you are just now starting this, Satan will try to bring you DOWN. He will tell you LIES to keep you in bed until you REALLY need to get up to get your day going! Don't let him win. He is a scumbag full of lies. I have a pair of Red TOMS shoes, and I wrote on the bottom of them this verse: Romans 16:20 The God of peace will soon crush Satan under your feet.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I love that verse! I also LOVE wearing those shoes! The first time I wore them after writing that verse on the bottom, my feet felt HEAVY. No joke. We were also going through adoption process and was hearing all kinds of lies from him, so I wrote that on my shoes, b/c those were the only shoes I wore for the LONGEST time (it was also very warm outside... ;) )</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br />I want to set an example for my kids. They watch what I do. They watch what I eat. They aren't the only ones who watch me. I want my kids to know that they need God to survive! They need physical training too. They also need a good balanced "diet". I don't like saying diet b/c it isn't a diet, I guess some say lifestyle. ;) I want them to eat healthy, so they feel good and not full on all that sugary foods and drinks.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Start them young... </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it. (Proverbs 22:6 ESV)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 18px;">Seek the Lord and his strength; seek his presence continually! (1 Chronicles 16:11 ESV) </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 18px;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Ask God to help you. Not just in working out, but with getting your devos done, or even to get through the day, or sometimes the hour.</span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 18px;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. (Ephesians 2:10 ESV) </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 18px;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. (1 Corinthians 6:19, 20 ESV)</span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">How do you start your day? It is on a solid foundation? Not just physically, but Spiritually as well.</span></span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">Again, not pointing fingers at anyone b/c I struggle too. They say it takes 30 days to form a habit, make it a good habit that you form. Schedule a time to do your devos and your workouts. </span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 18px;">But by the grace of</span><span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; display: inline; line-height: 18px;"> God I am what I am, and his grace toward me was not in vain. On the contrary, I worked harder than any of them, though it was not I, but the grace of God that is with me. (1 Corinthians 15:10 ESV) </span></span></div>
Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-38532780790227717232013-12-09T22:23:00.003-05:002013-12-09T22:23:47.479-05:00Mowing(wrote this back in August... and left it...)<br />
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We are having mower issues... As in, can't get the riding one to work. It's been one part after another. ;)<br />
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But have an awesome friend who won't give up and helping, well, let me re-phrase. He's doing all the work, we just buy the part and stand out of his way! :)<br />
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Anywho... Mowing today, earplugs in my ear, drowning out noises... Always do alot of thinking when I'm mowing, since I have to walk, it takes longer, which is TOTALLY ok! SO not complaining here! SUPER thankful I have legs to walk and be able to mow!<br />
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Just thinking and thanking God for slowing me down enough to mow. Yes, I'm thanking Him for mowing. It seems like life has just taken off. No slowing down. Even when we were on "vacation" I felt like we were going going going... Again, NOT complaining b/c I was so grateful to be able to see friends and family! But we got home, and bam, right back into our crazy life of appointments, getting this and that done and Curt's schedule just went crazy insane! It never ends does it? :)<br />
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So back to slowing down. When was the last time you just sat? Sat and prayed? Sat and thanked God for all He has blessed you with? Sat on your front porch, clearing your mind and not worrying about the laundry, what is for dinner, what work things you need to get done.<br />
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Everything now and days is fast. Faster phone, faster computers, faster service for oil changes, fast food restaurants, frozen food/pre made food... I could go on.<br />
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Now hang on, I do every now and then buy that frozen pre made stuff, but I much rather prefer to make something, so I'm NOT judging. I'm just letting my brain go. :)<br />
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I went and bought Taco Bell about a month or so ago. Sitting in the drive-through lane thinking and watching the clock, starting to get annoyed that it was taking so long. Um, wait a minute. Did I seriously just complain that my food wasn't ready at this restaurant in less than 5 minutes?<br />
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Really. Come on. I don't want my life to be a blur. I don't want to take things for granted. Seems like life in general is just more busy. What happened? We drive faster cars. We buy things to make our life easier.<br />
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Which is ok, to an extent. Just make sure you are taking the time you need and SLOW DOWN.<br />
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I have 6 kids, 2 whom need appointments quite often and one that has needed more care than I was hoping for. BUT my God is AWESOME and has blessed us beyond measure!<br />
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Make sure you sit back and enjoy what God has blessed you with! No matter what you are going through! Find the joy and cherish it and treasure it!Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-58270038966720321072013-11-22T12:05:00.001-05:002013-11-22T12:05:25.466-05:00Over a Year Now...Wowzers!! So much has happened since last blogging, I'm so behind!!!<br />
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Right after the last one back in July, I ended up taking Ella to see Dr Reilly... He told me to go home, pack some bags and bring her back to be emitted... Long story, she got MRSA in that ear and needed to have surgery to clean the area and wash it out, praying that would solve the prob....<br />
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Dakotah's birthday, August, 21st, I had to take her back in. They both had a hearing appointment and after showing audiologist, and making calls to assisting doc's, they said you need to bring her in TONIGHT. Exactly what I wanted to do on my daughters birthday! :\ So, ate some cake, opened her presents and off I took Ella, back in. Dr Reilly wasn't even in state until the following week... :\ They gave her the antibiotics, and said they didn't want to remove the device until Dr Reilly came back in town, which means they wanted me to stay in the hospital that long... I begged them to let us out by Saturday b/c I didn't want to stay there until Monday when Dr Reilly came back. They let us go with the antibiotics at home, along with another strong drug. A few days after Dr Reilly came back, we had surgery to remove her CI. This is now her 5th surgery... :( She was such a trooper and did GREAT!!!!<br />
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I told everyone that would listen our story! :) From adoption to all the visits, etc...<br />
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Through it all, it was tough, but God is good. He is just so awesome and just and fair! Yes, it was hard seeing my daughter go through all that, but I know that good can and will come out of it! I just pray she one day understands that, or completely forgets it all.... God used us by telling others just how AWESOME He is, even when things don't seem so fair, or right. I knew that God was with me the whole time, it's by His grace and strength that I made it through all that! I still praised Him through it all!<br />
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Fast forward a month and it's been ONE YEAR since we've been home with XJ and Ella!<br />
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Yes, it has been awesome and great, but it has been hard too! Yes, God has blessed us so much! But it doesn't mean there aren't hard times! There has been laughter, tears, struggles, joys, growth, improvement and sadness. Raising 6 kids is tough, but it is rewarding and I do thank God everyday that He trusts me enough to raise them! That He trusts me enough to loan them to me to raise, to become God-fearing Men and Women.<br />
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They have all adjusted very well! But there are days... Ella had reverted back for a good 2 months, where she refused to listen and would get that look in her eyes that she did when we were in China with her. She started biting her toes and toe nails again, gross, I know... ;) I know some people would say it's her age, but I won't agree with you on that one. Adopt a child and then we can talk. I mean no disrespect by that comment. Yes some it has to do with age, but I also know how she was and how she can be when she doesn't want to listen, just be very defiant. ;) She is doing much better again.<br />
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Finally got all the kids in for annual check ups and eye doc appointments too... Kotah is now wearing glasses, some of the time, and Thad got a new pair, but his are all the time... Praying these new specs do the trick or we may have to talk surgery for his eye. But placing that all in Gods hands! XJ also needs glasses! I'm pretty excited for him to get them and to see how much it helps him! Just in walking even! :) Poor guy wasn't seeing very well, and I thought that was the case, but got caught up in all the hearing appointments, that that got pushed aside... And I REFUSED to go back to LensCrafters! Finally found an AWESOME doc, and she did GREAT with Ella and XJ! I really didn't want to have to take them up to Children's for their eyes too, already taking Thad up there.. ;)<br />
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Homeschooling is going good. We got gifted a desk top which has been a HUGE blessing since the older 2 do their work on the computer, it's an online curriculum. Will also get Skylar on there really soon too! :) XJ, Ella and Thad are doing great at what I'm giving them to do! XJ just needs lots of repetition. But he is learning and doing good! :)<br />
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God is so good! He has blessed us in so many ways! Can't wait to see what else He has in store for our family! I know He isn't done b/c we are all still breathing! ;) It may not make sense what His plans are, but I'm excited to do whatever He asks of me and my family! I am Yours God, USE me!!!Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-4887225942551382622013-07-16T14:20:00.001-04:002013-07-16T14:20:53.408-04:00Hearing Update!!!Been a while... sorry... Life has just been super crazy... not something I wanted, but it's my life right now, and I'm ok with that. :)<br />
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Hearing appointments and speech have taken over our lives the last few weeks, and I guess month!<br />
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Ella had her left side re-done on 5-31. She got activated on that side 7-2. Things are going GREAT! She did have some stitches that were sticking out, and emailed doc about them, and took her in last week and he snipped them... Then I emailed him Sunday (3:30pm) about a spot that was about the size of a nickel, a bit bigger, but was big, pink and squishy. I know, kinda gross, sorry. ;) He CALLED me that evening around 5:30, on a SUNDAY to talk to me about it, called in an antibiotic and said to bring her in Wednesday so he can look at it. It's gone down a bit, but still there... <br />
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I joked with Curt saying that recovery and activation has been sooooo much BETTER this time around, something had to happen right? :)<br />
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We have all our bills now from insurance from the surgery. For the 3 implants, and hospital, rooms, etc, the total was over $335,000.00. Yes, you read that right. Go ahead, pick your jaw up, I'll wait. ;) <br />
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Yes, it's insane how much it all costs. But we knew God would help and we knew that He was telling us to go ahead with the surgery. (this is NOT including Ellas re-surgery) We are still getting co pays and all from hearing check ups and then speech therapy... But we only had to pay just over $6,000! We got XJ's bills pretty quick, and was still waiting on Ellas, and it finally just went through! Can't believe how awesome our insurance is right now! I also know that God played a big part in this for taking care of us! We are still tight b/c of some bills, but just can NOT believe we've only had to pay that much! God is so good! ALLL the time!!! :)<br />
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Now, about Ellas second surgery. Went into it by Dr Reilly saying he wasn't going to charge us. But we figured the recovery room and all we would pay for. We knew that he wasn't charging for his surgery, and he was pretty sure the processor would be covered b/c he had to get a new one for her.<br />
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When I took her in for her one week post - op check up, he told me, if you get ANY bill from that day, PLEASE let me know! I said ok.<br />
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Well we got a few, we had already paid (Cheap ones...), and then we got one for the processor. I sent it to him and he wrote back right away saying he would bring it to billings attention.<br />
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He told me when I took her in for the snipped stitches that he didn't want us to have to pay for anything from that surgery. He said if it was his kid, he wouldn't want to pay for a mistake the doc made, and it was a crazy one b/c it just doesn't happen! (the thin wire missed cochlea and went over her nerve that keeps her balance, and so when we went to get it activated, she went into a seizure like mode...) He also told me that since that happened he will NOT use the processors with the thin wire, he doesn't want that mistake again.<br />
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I think he FINALLY gets it that we are NOT upset or mad at him for what happened! He didn't know this would happen and he was already being cautious! Like I said before, I know God had a plan, and He provided for us. :)<br />
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I HIGHLY recommend Dr Reilly at the DC Childrens, ENT. He has been FANTASTIC!!! <br />
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When I sent him the email about Ella and the pic of her ear on Sunday, he basically told me (not being mean), but that I should've just texted him the pic and called him. But it was Sunday, and i wasn't going to do that! Family time, but he took the time and called in antibiotic so we could start it right away. He has shown soooo much concern for us, and I truly appreciate it and all he has done!<br />
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Taking her tomorrow to have the spot checked, then another hearing appointment, which is called mapping, next week. She will have that side turned up one more time, and then they will both be at about where they will be. XJ is pretty much staying the same volume as well... Then they have another speech therapy next week. :)<br />
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Last week I was wondering how I was going to home school XJ. Could I really do it? just feeling down and discouraged... But after watching her work with him and getting a few ideas on how to teach him, I am encouraged and ready! Keep REPEATING is KEY!!! :) I bought a few cheap books at the Target and Dollar Store to start working with him. I've never had to teach a child who is deaf and a little bit of a slow learner, but I can do this b/c God will equip me and give me what I need when I need it. I know without a doubt that God has called these 2 into our family and am super blessed to be their mom, forever! <br />
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I always said I didn't want to have to be going here and there and in the car alot, but God is teaching me some things on that! :) We've all spent alot of time in the car going here and there for their appointments, but I know this is a season, and things will slow down. <br />
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BAHAHA, who am I kidding? Cecil house slow down? Ok, fine, maybe in my dreams! ;)Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-39335407618635485892013-07-01T22:00:00.001-04:002013-07-01T22:00:27.607-04:00How Are You Affecting Those Around You?Ok, too tied to think if its effecting or affecting... And yes, frankly too lazy to look it up! ;)<div><br></div><div>Today we went to church, and then had to go get some paint to paint a "new" room for Gavin as a surprise for him when he gets home!!! :) My mom is out here for the week and she said ok, where do you want to go to eat? Thad and Skylar shout out Chick-fil-A!!! We said they are closed, it's Sunday remember? To which they replied oh yeah.</div><div><br></div><div>So mom was asking what else there is??? Then she said oh do you have a Panera? So I drove to the LaPlata one bc it's nicer and smaller and not as busy... We had thought about running to JoAnn Fabrics to get something but decided we didn't need to go out there yet, so all the more reason to stay in LaPlata! ;)</div><div><br></div><div>Trying to ask the kids what they want while 3 of them have to "pee REALLY bad!!!" So trying to get them to decide was impossible... Finally got it and I took the 3 to the bathroom. As soon as I entered I heard a screaming/crying very unhappy baby... I got one in and then waited for the mom and baby to exit stale so another could go in. My kids were being patient too.. Thankfully... ;)</div><div><br></div><div>She exited and saw me standing with my two waiting and kept saying I'm so sorry. I said its fine, no worries at all! </div><div><br></div><div>She said a few other things and kept apologizing to which I said its no big deal. Trying to smile the whole time bc she's clearly upset, well maybe upset isn't the right word? Frazzled?</div><div><br></div><div>She was at the sink and I had one out standing with me and she said apologizing again and I said its ok! I have 6 kids, I'm a mom, I've had a newborn before, I know what it's like. She looked at me and said you have 6? She then looked at Ella and XJ and asked of they were mine to which I relied yes ma'am, we adopted them from China.</div><div><br></div><div>Let me just say that as soon as she walked out of the stale with this crying baby I knew I needed to talk to her.</div><div><br></div><div>I saw a rosary with a crucifix on it on her wrist. She then said she had 5 of her own and the one screaming baby boy was a foster child. They wanted to adopt but a few reasons didn't allow them too so they thought ok, foster to adopt. They felt this was Gods plan for them. </div><div><br></div><div>I asked her what her name was, she told me. I said Carolyn, I'm praying for you. I'll be praying you have a blessed day.</div><div><br></div><div>She walked out and then came back in with a bottle she needed to clean and refill... She said oh, I'm in your way again, I said no you aren't. Take your time and get your son his bottle, we are fine.</div><div><br></div><div>She walked out then and I felt this tap on my shoulder... I said yes God? He said you have some cash, buy this family a gift card. I said uh, ok.</div><div><br></div><div>So I met my mom and Skylar and we found a place in the back to eat and I noticed this lady her foster son and daughter were sitting back there.</div><div><br></div><div>We got our food and started eating after we prayed... I felt her watching me and could see it from the corner of my eye but wasn't bothered by it.</div><div><br></div><div>I stood up to go buy the gift card so incase she left before us I could give it to her...</div><div><br></div><div>After a while her daughter came over and said excuse me miss? My mom was wondering if after you are done with your lunch if you could come talk to her? I said sure, give me a minute. So I finished my sandwich and walked over to her table and sat down.</div><div><br></div><div>I laid the gift card on the table and she looked up at me and stated to say you don't, to which I raised my hand and said, don't. I know I didn't need to but felt called to, it's not much, but it should either get your whole family a free meal or super cheap. ;) I figured in my head how much ours was and added some extra bc we were missing some in our family! ;) I said if you are like my family you don't get to eat out much bc it's expensive! She shook her head yes and then said thank you.</div><div><br></div><div>Then she sat there and said what I have to say is so hard and I don't think I can say what I need to without crying. I, sitting there like uh oh, what did I do?! ;)</div><div><br></div><div>Then she said I've been trying to explain to my daughter a little about you and watching your family. You have a beautiful family. I just wanted you to know that you saved this lil boys life. I just looked at her like what?</div><div><br></div><div>She then said she had planned on going home right after lunch and emailing the social worker and telling them they needed to come get this lil boy, but after talking to me briefly in the bathroom, watching me with my kids, watching me sign to them and with them, she knew that she couldn't do that. She realized that these thoughts aren't her. She doesn't think like that. She doesn't care what defects a child has. She was thinking she can't handle his crying, she told me in bathroom that's all he does. Cries. She said something but I didn't hear it, but he is deaf in one ear and then his foot started shaking, she said see,? I don't know everything wrong with him and was thinking if they do allow him to be adopted by us would I want him before I know everything that's wrongs with him?</div><div><br></div><div>She doesn't know what the future holds for him, but she does know now that bc of seeing me and talking to me that she will keep him and pray for the next step instead of just doing it without asking God what His plan is.</div><div><br></div><div>I'm not writing this to say oh look what I did. I just wanted to share and felt led to share this. I was blown away by it all. I actually didn't have as much money as I thought and so I asked mom for a few bucks and would pay her when I got home bc I knew I had some cash at home. She looked at me and said sure.. I said feeling led to buy her a gift card I'll explain in the car... So she gave me a few extra bucks. :) (thanks momma) Then after I was done talking to her I went over to my family and I ate my few bites of soup. It was hard to eat bc I was processing it all, or trying to.</div><div><br></div><div>People tell you you may have impacted their life, or want to follow your example or your lead, but I've never EVER had someone tell me that I saved their sons life by that little bit of conversation in bathroom and my actions and love towards my kids.</div><div><br></div><div>Just bc a child has a disability doesn't mean you can't love them, teach them or raise them. Infact they teach you, they love you! </div><div><br></div><div>I got in the van and just told mom everything that happened and was pretty much in tears. My mom was just about in tears.</div><div><br></div><div>All of this to say, are you living a life that is a good example to others? That they truly see the love of Jesus shining through you, so much that they notice it?</div><div><br></div><div>Now I've got days, days where Jesus' light doesn't shine through much bc of the way my day has gone or is going. I'm not perfect and I don't want to be. </div><div><br></div><div>I didn't feel at peace about going on the missions trip. I felt bad bc the kids wanted me to go, but when I said I prayed and just didn't feel that God was calling me to go this time, they both said oh, ok!! Maybe next year :)</div><div><br></div><div>I know why. God had a plan and I needed I be home. </div><div><br></div><div>Just think about your actions and words. They really do have more power than you may think they do.</div>Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-83594846825539875152013-06-07T19:33:00.004-04:002013-06-07T19:33:51.372-04:00How Much Is Too Much???I've been trying to go through and clean the whole house. Not just clean, but purge of things. Buuuut with 6 kids and then two of them having surgery, weekly check ups, then another surgery to fix it.... I haven't gotten very far... ;)<br />
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But today as I was cleaning I kept looking at the two rooms I was trying to make a pathway through, yet again. I was thinking, how much of this do we really need? I was cleaning up the Legos, then the school room and office. It is a mess in there. So not going to lie. Legos had gotten everywhere, some of the kids get in them, and don't put them away while other kids walk right by it and not bother to pick it up. Then the games, Oy... I've been through the games but wondering if I need to go through them again? </div>
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My thoughts all day today: how much is too much? How much can I get rid of but yet still be comfy? I'm gonna be honest, part of me has a hard time parting with things bc of a memory I have with it. I know crazy, but still.</div>
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My other thing is clothes, I've gotten rid of a lot of clothes and still need to finish my hanging clothes but haven't been able to get to them yet... I won't say that there is a dresser right in the middle of that closet.... ;) I don't want to be wearing the same thing over and over, but lets face it, we all have that go shirt or pants or sweat shirt. Right? Or am I only the one that does that? :) I've gotten quite a bit of hand me downs, but realized I'm not wearing them all. It's amazing what a scarf and jewelry can do to make it look different! :) I'm not sure how many shirts I had before I started purging my clothes, but so far I have a heaping laundry basket full of clothes to get rid of. I have enough. I prob could go through them and even get rid of a bit more. Maybe I'll do it again next spring? </div>
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I'm trying to get things done so I can do that yard sale! I haven't given up on getting one done! :) I've got a few pieces of furniture that we don't need anymore! One for sure is a twin size chair that pulls out into a bed. It's taking up space. We don't use it except to hold blankets... Which is another thing I need to go through.</div>
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My house isn't huge, but it isn't small. But with a family of 8, it can feel small and tight in certain rooms bc of what we have.</div>
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Thinking of what I can get rid of and still be comfy. How comfy do I want to be? Are there any things you can get rid of and still be comfy? How comfy do you want to be? <br />
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My dishwasher broke a few days ago, so we've been washing dishes. So for complaining! I'm so thankful for a roof over my head and bed to sleep in! Our mower broke yet again. I'm not sure what it is with mowers and us?!!?? :) but that's life, thins are going to break and things are going to happen! But it's how to deal with those circumstances... Are you going to pout and throw yourself a pity party, or are you going to thank God for what you have?</div>
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I thank God I have a sink to wash those dishes (and kids to help me! :)), I thank God that I have a husband that can now fix our mower, thanks to a friend who helped him! I thank God that if we can't fix something I know there is someone in my church family that will help us! :)</div>
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So the next time something doesn't go the way "you" want it too, how are you gong to react? Yes it isn't always easy to start singing praises and thank God for what you have, but I challenge you to sing and thank God the next time something breaks, you feel overwhelmed, or things just don't go the way you thought they should! Maybe we are all in the fast lane and God is trying to get our attention? Maybe we need to move back into that slow lane. Maybe we need to sit still and do nothing and just listen to Hm.</div>
Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-78984834873434114672013-06-04T14:59:00.000-04:002013-06-04T14:59:27.760-04:00Activation Day!!!Wow, super late... But better late than never right? ;)<br />
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Both Ella and XJ got activated May 20, 2013... Exactly 8 months since they've been home! So happy home 8 months day and activation day! :D<br />
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Got up there and found out that both of Ella's CI's processors came in, but XJ's didn't. So I was going to have a loaner for XJ for a week until we went back up to get them mapped... (mapped = turn volume up on remote which makes their CI's louder) <br />
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This is going to be long, and feel free to skip certain videos, but I'm posting all videos we took that day. :)<br />
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Here's how the day went...<br />
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Here Patricia is testing her electroids and finding out which one she hears, once she hears the sound, she is to drop the block in the bucket...<br />
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Here she turned on the left side, and quickly realized that something wasn't right... You can't fully see her eyes in this video, but you can hear Patricia saying she is prob getting dizzy... That's not normal. That shouldn't happen.<br />
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Here you can hear what's going on... But still not right...<br />
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Here we are doing the left side now. Towards the end she make faces b/c it's too loud, or she doesn't like the sound. She's also getting antsy and tired... ;)<br />
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Here is the one you will def want to watch! Time to turn it on so she can hear us!!! :D<br />
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Here's two with XJ dropping blocks in the bucket! :)<br />
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Here's the one you def watch to with XJ! It's turned on and he can hear us!!! :D (he just doesn't respond to me... ;)) Starting at 3:25, be prepared to laugh or cry... ;) It's the best part!! :D<br />
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And just some observation... ;)<br />
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Last one... Ella with her eyes... Not nearly as bad as it was the first time she turned her on, but she also turned it down some...<br />
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<br />
So that is what is NOT supposed to happen! She called Dr Reilly before we left and he wanted to do a CT scan that week. <br />
<br />
We left there and went on home! The kids did GREAT! They each have a remote that has 4 programs and each program goes to volume 10. They said they wanted them to hopefully by atleast to 3.10 by the time we went back next week... Well, XJ was at 4.10 by the next day (Tuesday) and Ella was at 4.10 on Wednesday.<br />
<br />
Wednesday I finally called about CT scan, b/c doc said it would be yet this week, and should hear no later than Tuesday, and be in Wed, Thurs for the scan... After some emails and personal phone calls from Dr Reilly, we went in that Friday to have scan and it was read by the doc right afterwards.<br />
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It was as we had thought, she needed to have surgery again to fix the prob. The electroid didn't go into the cochela, it went partway in and then went flip up to her vestibular nerve. English terms: it means it hit the nerve which causes you to not be dizzy, stand and not fall over, etc... He used a different thickness wire for this implant. The other side had a thicker wire... So the plan was to have it re-done as soon as we were comfortable with it.<br />
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I called Curt on the way home and told him what was happening and then he said well, it needs done, let's do it asap. Dr Reilly told me he could do it the next Friday... So I sent him email and said ok, let's do it.<br />
<br />
So we got on the books and got it done Friday (the 31st)<br />
<br />
Curt stayed home with the kids and I went with Ella, bright and early Friday morning! I was praying that she wouldn't be nervous knowing and remembering the last time... <br />
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Dr Reilly told me was going to do X-rays before and after just to make sure it entered the cochlea all the way! I also found out that was a trip trying to do X-rays while she was still open and then not knowing if it was the left or the right side they were looking at! :) But they got it and it's all done!<br />
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Ella's recovery this time was SOOOOOO much better!!!! She was up to pee about an hour after waking, which is COMPLETELY different than last! She WALKED back to her bed after going to the bathroom, she ate 3 popsicles, 2 apple juice AND had dinner that night! Then she ate MY chips for a snack! :)<br />
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She slept through most of the night, I think she kinda woke up, but she went back to sleep... They did move us at 10... I was just drifting off to sleep and I hear this hello momma, I'm so sorry, but we need to move you closer to nurses station. There were only 4 patients besides us, and they wanted us all closer to station, and we were the only ones by exit door. So guess where they put us? Same room we had the first time! ;) Thankfully Ella went right back to sleep... They just moved her bed, but the motion woke up, but like I said, she went right back to sleep! I was close to follow then! ;)<br />
<br />
Woke up at 5, and she was asking for a popsicle at 6:30! IN THE MORNING!!! :)<br />
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Doc came in around 9ish to change the ear covering, and then we were OUTTA there! :)<br />
<br />
The doc who came in to change ear covering remembered us! Also, we had a few of the same nurses who remembered us! One walked by us after she got up the first time and said, hey! Wait! Why are you back? Then proceeded to ask about her brother and how the rest of the family was doing!!! :)<br />
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The first nurse we had was seriously an answer to prayer! She was absolutely FANTASTIC! She made it so much nicer!!! Less than an hour went by after I talked to her a bit... She said she was a Christian and felt called to adopt! She is pregnant with their first, but adoption is DEF on their hearts! :) She asked about our story and so later on I got to tell her! In a nutshell version! :) I was texting Curt about her and he said the same thing I was thinking, "God moment". <br />
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I'm sad that I had to put Ella through the surgery again. I'm sad that it didn't work out the first time, BUT I'm NOT sad about Katie and being able to meet her, tell her my story, for her to meet Ella, tell her I'm praying for her. This whole last week-end was so def planned by God! It couldn't have gone any smoother! :)<br />
<br />
I ran into to Target to get her antibiotic filled and they told me the wait would be an hour. I was like oh, ok. I'll just walk around. I texted Curt and said hey it's going to be an hour, should I just come home? Then I walked around for a bit after deciding to stay, b/c I didn't want to have to go back out... I get a text from the pharmacy saying it was done, after 15 minutes! I walk over to counter and the pharmacist was checking me out, I looked at her and said, did you fill that sooner? She just looked at me and smiled. When I went up to pay the person behind me dropping off their script, the pharmacist said it would be an hour and fifteen minutes. So I knew something was up! ;)<br />
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Just as I was paying Curt texted and asked if I wanted to meet at Chick-fil-A for lunch. It is a rare treat to eat out for us! :) But I was tired and figured it would be a nice treat for everyone, so I said ok. I bet him there and walked in and there was an older gentlemen and his wife. he was making over Ella and smiling and waving at her. Picture Ella with the big ear muff on one side, and a bandaide on the other hand from the IV... Then walks in the rest of the gang and he's doing the same to all of them as well. We finally get up to order and I see him standing next to Curt, but didn't think about it, my brain is still tired... ;) Curt thought he was trying to cut in to get a re-fill! Haha! :) But he said, excuse me, put it all on this card. Curt said what? You don't have to do that! The guy responds with, hey, it's not my money, it's His and when He tells me to do something, I BETTER do it! :) I look at Curt trying to process what just happened! I took kids and we sat down while Curt and Gavin waited for the food. They brought it over and I told the kids we need to go thank that guy and his wife, he just paid for our lunch! Kotah and Gavin said WHAT?? He did what? So we walked over and the kids all said Thank you and I'm teary eyed thanking him and his wife for what he did! I said it's been a week-end, my daughter had to have her ear re-done b/c the cochlear implant didn't take the first time, I'm just getting home with being gone for just over 24 hours... he just looked at me and said, no, thank you for blessing us! Your family is so sweet and it's so neat to see you all just walk in. His wife just sat there and smiled and shook her head agreeing. We talked a bit, and then walked back over to eat out lunch.<br />
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So you see, things don't always go the way we want them too. Yes, I was bummed it didn't take. But I KNEW without a doubt that God had a plan! Sometimes it hurts, sometimes we experience pain, and it may not be us that experiences it, sometimes it's our kids that have to go through that pain. But I hope and pray that my kids understand the same thing I do, that it doesn't matter what happens, as long as He gets all the glory and praise! My God is an awesome God! I thank Him for blessing us this week-end the way He did! Unbelievable! Really, it couldn't have turned out any better! :DSleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-63385673664643108022013-06-04T13:57:00.002-04:002013-06-04T13:57:27.098-04:00Food(I didn't get a chance to finish and post this on the 19th of May....) <br />
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<br />
Wow! I've done such a GREAT job at keeping up with this! :\<br />
<br />
I posted a while ago about not buying any food, well, trying NOT to buy anything, for the whole month of May! I posted what I fixed for the first 2 days, and now it's the 19th... So sorry!<br />
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I've bought 3 loaves of bread and 2 gallons of milk, and 3 packages of 18 count eggs. That's it. I still can't believe it's been 19 days! I miss my fresh fruit, but we are totally making by with what we have!<br />
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We've also been blessed beyond measure by our awesome church family! They gave us meals until the 10th! It was every other night, but it was AWESOME!! I was thinking, eh, I'll be fine and ready to get to cooking and all by then... Wow. I can't believe how TIRED I was still after the kids surgery! Who knew? ;) I wasn't even the one who HAD the surgery! It's true what they say, the kids def bounce back a lot faster than the parent! Or atleast the momma! :)<br />
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I'll do my best and post what we had, but I can honestly say, I don't remember everything! :( I should've written it down... but I didn't.... I think I'll go backwards... Start from today, and work my way back to what I remember! :)<br />
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Day 19-<br />
Breakfast - baked apple/cinnamon steel cut oats<br />
Lunch- pb and j<br />
Supper- (have a freezer meal from a month or so ago... It wasn't enough for a full meal, but didn't want to waste it, so I just added a few potatoes and milk! :)) Potato and corn chowder soup<br />
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Day 18-<br />
Breakfast - Cold oats with puffed millet/ strawberries<br />
Lunch-<br />
Supper- Tilapia fish fillets with half a stick of butter and seasoned with Happy Salt (Happy Salt, something my mom got from me from the Amish store.. SOOOOO good! It's a mixture of pepper, sea salt, garlic and I think onion?) Cilantro/garlic rice and strawberries<br />
Dessert- I had made one chocolate strawberries<br />
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Day 17-<br />
Breakfast- Leftover pumpkin oatmeal made into "pancakes"<br />
Lunch-<br />
Dinner- Spicy tomato soup - was frozen in freezer...<br />
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Day 16-<br />
Breakfast- pumpkin oatmeal<br />
Lunch- "snack lunch" (crackers, cheese, last of the frozen cherries, and whatever else I could find to throw on their plate! ;))<br />
Supper- hamburgers, tomatoes with fresh mozzerlla on top, with salt, pepper, and a bit of olive oil and basil.<br />
(a friend was leaving town for a few days and dropped us off this meal! PLUS I have enough hamburgers to make for one more meal! THANK YOU!!!!)<br />
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Day 15-<br />
Ok, I'm gonna be honest, I'm not remembering much anymore... I feel bad b/c I wanted to keep track and write EVERYTHING down that we've eaten! Because it is easy to come up with good stuff to eat!<br />
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I have fixed alot of oatmeal for the kids... They don't complain, which is good... It's amazing the different ways you can fix that! I planned on making some granola yet tonight so they would have that tomorrow morning, but I have yet to fix it.<br />
I also need to figure out what I'm fixing for tomorrow's lunch and dinner in the van! Kids have their activation and we will be in the van for both meals... I did buy a bag of animal crackers for them tomorrow... Just b/c I know they will need a snack! :)<br />
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I made chicken salad inside tortillas, for the kids activation day dinner and pb and j for lunch on the way up.<br />
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I did get sick towards the end of this, and I didn't count in the mommy getting sick factor, what will they eat? Curt can cook, but there wasn't hardly anything in the frig or cupboards for him to make anything! :\ So he had bought pizza one night and made sure there was enough bread and eggs... The kids love making breakfast and had made eggs and Gavin made pancakes with the left over pancake mix I had... Kotah made some doughnuts using her doughnut maker from Gramma. :)<br />
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Yes, we did run out of fresh veggies and fruit after about 2-3 weeks... I was missing that, but really, we had enough food to make it! Infact, I still have things to use and plan on just going to Farmer's Market to buy some local veggies and fruit... Which I have already... ;)<br />
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Will def try to post some more recipes soon... If I have a spare minute or two! :)<br />
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I challenge you to try the same. See how long you can go with the food in your freezer, frig and pantry. It's amazing the things you come up with! I didn't take pics of everything I made, but I will try and post things I made! They all turned out really good too! Not once did we go hungry!<br />
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I did buy bread, milk and eggs... But all in all, without the food we had to buy for camping and the dinner for when I was sick, I think I spent $50 for the whole month! :)Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-23799127786253032882013-05-19T15:16:00.001-04:002013-05-19T15:16:35.456-04:00Chen Fu Yi<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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(I wrote this the day we got her info and had to take it down b/c China hadn't "officially" said she was ours yet, so we had to delete everything we posted... Just looking through my blogs I found this... I soooo remember that day so very well! ;))<br />
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Oh my, what a day!<br />
It was a pretty good day, getting things done, etc...<br />
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I put a super yummy apple crisp in the oven for our dessert last nite...<br />
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Then the phone rang a little bit before 5... I didn't recognize the number, but picked up. It was Aimee, our home coordinator for AWAA. <br />
Her and Curt had been emailing back and forth a few things on our WC (Waiting Child) application. They wanted it to be more specific and which ones would we DEF take, etc...<br />
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So he put down personal experience in deafness...<br />
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She wrote back and said be more clear...<br />
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So he wrote back, that I had taught it to some high school students for a year as their foreign language, I took classes before I was married and got certified through those classes...<br />
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So that was fresh in her mind and then this precious girl came across her desk...<br />
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She also asked me how we felt, or if we had any problems with getting a child close in age or the same age of one of ours already. I told her no, not at all. I said, we just put that age range because we didn't know, we didn't know which child God has for us... :)<br />
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She called to tell us another question we had pertaining to something else, and then she asked if Curt was home. I said yes he is, do you want to talk to him? She said well, I was wondering if there is a way I could talk to both of you? I said sure, I can put you on speaker phone... <br />
At this point I am PRAYING that the kids are quiet... I knew Thad was getting hungry and they can all smell the dessert at this point! :)<br />
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So I give him the phone and said she wants to talk to the both of us.. So he put it on speaker phone.. She was talking about a form that we hadn't sent in yet because we need $890 and we didn't quite have it, etc... But she was saying sometimes it happens when a child comes in and they match what an prospective parent(s) want... So she said with JUST having got the last email from Curt at like 3 that afternoon, this lil girl came across her desk...<br />
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So that's why she asked about how we felt about the closeness of age in a child and if it's close to the same age in ours already....<br />
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So back to the convo... She said a whole bunch of other stuff pertaining to the application, yadda yadda yadda. It's not really yadda, but we got the jist.. I was wondering where this was going...<br />
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I kinda knew and thought that this would be happening fast, but then I was like nah, it's not going to go that fast, we still need to turn in that form with the money, and we need to get a van.... But deep down I just had the feeling, trust me child, it's coming... Be prepared...<br />
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So then she said I have a little girl whose name is Chen Fu Yi and she just turned 3 years old on Jan 3. She's deaf in both ears, that's why I thought of you with Mandy's past experience.<br />
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She then said we would have 2 days to look over the file and her pic and then if we said yes, we would have 10 days to fill out some forms, take them to a doc to have them look them over, etc....<br />
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She said we could take as little as 5 minutes to say yes or no, or as long as the 2 days...<br />
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Aimee said before we hung up that she would send all the info and it would be in our email in 5 minutes...<br />
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Let's just say it was NOT 5 minutes... This was absolute PURE TORTURE!!!!! <br />
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I went over to Face book and changed my status to Ugh, feels like I'm waiting on a POSITIVE on a pregnancy test!!!<br />
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I was "thinking" some might get it.. but most people knew it was a code, but didn't quite get it...<br />
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In the mean time b/c I did not want to get up b/c I did NOT want to miss that email, I totally forgot about the apple crisp, browning ever so nicely in my oven.... (it got burnt to a CRISP, it was DEFINITELY apple CRISP!! LOL I don't EVER burn ANYTHING either... ;)<br />
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We FINALLY got the email with Chen's pics and file and info... We immediately said yes upon seeing her pic! My heart melted right away, I knew she was mine... I didn't care about anything else! :) She was the one God had for us!<br />
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We read all the papers, at first wondering HOW we would read them since they were all in Chinese!!! hahaha... then going down to the last 2 papers, it was all written out in English... ;)<br />
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We called the kids into the room, sat them down, and told them and then showed them the pic of Chen. They all got HUGE smiles and said YES!!! So we sat down and we all prayed... <br />
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We called Aimee back and figured we'd get her voice mail, but she was still in office, so we told her YES! Then she sent us the rest of the info we needed to get the rest of the forms filled out.<br />
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I called my mom, then we tried to call Curt's parents but they weren't picking up....<br />
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Then Curt added to my status and took what her name means and put that all in CAPS LOCK... ;) That had a few people going even more, was getting a few texts to ANSWER them NOW.... But I was trying to wait til we got ahold of Curt's parents... ;)<br />
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As soon as he told his parents I changed my pic to Chen!<br />
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Chen Fu Yi will be Galadriella Fu Yi Cecil, or Ella as some of us are calling her... <br />
I'm so anxious to hold her in my arms! This is the day I've been praying for! I've been praying for Chen Fu Yi, my sweet Galadriella!<br />
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I'm anxiously praying for my sweet lil man now! I don't know where he is, who he is, or how soon we will find out, but I'm praying for him! <br />
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We do not know when we will get her, we don't have travel dates, etc... But she's OURS!!! :)<br />
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We are hoping that we will have our lil man at the same time so we don't have to take 2 trips, but it could happen.... I'm praying that we can get our sweet Ella and sweet lil man at the same time, but God has that all worked out!<br />
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We need a van, so we are looking at the Honda Odysseys... I'm just asking for a dvd player and that it seats 8... ;) So if you know of anyone or a van, let us know... We SERIOUSLY need it now! It's moving along... ;)<br />
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Chen means Morning<br />
Fu mean Happiness<br />
Yi means Righteous<br />
Galadriella means Maiden crowned by a radiant garland<br />
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I'm sitting here all giddy, waiting, trying to wait patiently... I tell myself, it takes 9-10 months for a baby to cook, we will get her before then... It's just hard b/c we have a face, a name...<br />
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Thanks you Jesus for blessing us! I can't wait to go get my lil kids! She's absolutely PERFECT! :)Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-64245432716094659562013-05-19T15:10:00.003-04:002013-05-19T15:10:49.761-04:00Kids UpdateTomorrow is THE day! The day XJ and Ella get activated! :D<br />
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To be honest I was NOT worried about Ella, with her having hearing aides, and having heard really loud noises without them, I figured she would be fine. Well, as I had said after they had sown her up and tested her right ear, some of the electroids weren't working... Our audiologist said she wanted to test her BEFORE activation that way she knows what she will be dealing with, and it's one less thing she will have to do. She may still need to do a little, but not as much. So I said ok... This was last Friday, that day we had to apply for Gavin's passport, and dinner out to meet friends and then someone coming from AWAA b/c we were in charge of a seminar on Saturday, which was also Thad's b-day... needless to say, I REALLY did NOT want to add one more thing into this day, but knew I needed to go....<br />
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Packed the muchkins up and headed to the Upper Marlboro Office.<br />
<br />
THANK YOU JESUS! ALLLLL 22 electroids ARE working in Ella's right ear! I sighed a HUGE sigh and said Thank you Jesus for answering prayer!<br />
<br />
She did GREAT while she was measuring the right ear... Then she moved to the left ear.... After 7ish minutes she was done. She just looked at me, not able to explain what she was hearing and feeling, but had this look like PLEASE MOM, make it stop NOW! I just signed its ok, wait a minute ok? I rubbed her back, gave her kisses, and just held her.<br />
<br />
Audiologist said it was almost done with that frequency, and it was, then moved on to another one, she did ok, then yet another one, and almost in tears. She stopped it. So, my thinking of her being ok, may not be so true. I don't know how best to explain it, but she could hear the electroids firing off, in different tones and frequencies. Some obviously higher than others.<br />
<br />
They don't ever show those videos of the child crying b/c they don't know what to expect once they activate their implant. They don't ever show the fear in that child. They just don't show it, but I can tell you what, it happens! I just saw a video of someone I "met" via facebook who has adopted and they did the CI in one ear, and was just activated recently. She cried. She had no idea what it was.<br />
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Granted, Ella has had some hearing, so I really don't think it will be too big of an issue for her. Once she gets past the firing and measuring of the electroids, and gets used to the different sounds.<br />
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It won't be the same as hearing like we do. An cochlea implant is computerized. You know Kit from Night Rider right? Ok, picture that sound, only a bit more "modern". They will be able to tell the difference between my voice and Curt's, and the kids. They will be able to hear music. They will be able to hear EVERYTHING. It will be turned down low at first, so as not to scare them. Ella's may be turned up more b/c she's heard before, but I don't know for sure.<br />
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XJ, that's another story. His brain could refuse the noises entering in his brain b/c he has heard NOTHING for the first 6 yrs of his life. OR his brain could be like hey, I need to register this. What is this? I know whatever happens that it is all apart of God's awesome and mighty plan! I trust Him NO MATTER what happens! <br />
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I have prayed EVERY STEP of this journey and we are FAR from being done! :) We've been home for EIGHT MONTHS (tomorrow will be 8 months....) and this is just the beginning! <br />
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I will post video here and my facebook as soon as I can! Appointment is at 1pm, and we may not leave until 5pm or after 5pm.<br />
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Praying for ALL my kids! I've got some things and snacks for them! We will be eating lunch in the van on the way up (have to go to Scottish Rite Center in DC for activation...) and supper in the van on the way home... ;) Now I have to go figure out what I'm packing for lunch and dinner..... ;)Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-66154332404382777462013-05-02T15:25:00.002-04:002013-05-02T15:25:46.429-04:00Day 1 and 2If you've seen my or Curt's status yesterday you will know what's going on... And if you didn't that's ok, I'm gonna explain it a bit... ;)<br />
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Curt read a book called More or Less by Jeff Shinabarger. I'm only 4 chapters in, and wow.<br />
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Before Curt started reading this book, I've wanted to go through the house and simplify. We have too much stuff. :) The kids have enough clothes and we can get rid of some, they have enough toys, we can get rid of some, I have more than enough clothes, I need to get rid of some, I have more than enough kitchen tools, I can get rid of some, let's face it, we have enough. We have a house, each child has a bed, and clothes to wear, we have 2 bathrooms that have 2 showers and 2 toilets. We are rich compared to some...<br />
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So as he is reading this book, he is telling me about it and posting lines from the book on his FaceBook page. I couldn't wait for him to finish it so I could read it, then the kids had surgery and I couldn't wrap my brain around anything except get through the day! :) So now I'm finally reading it! :D<br />
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Curt was telling me about this food "challenge" that Jeff and his wife had done. They thought they had enough food to last them a month, to actually see the cupboards bare. They wanted to go a whole month without buying any food (except for some essentials). So guess what Curt and I decided to do? In order to save some money to pay some more on adoption and hospital bills, we prayed and decided to do this!<br />
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I know I have some canned stuff that needs to be eaten, and I know that I have stuff in the freezer as well. Let's see if a family of 8 can get by with a whole month and not buy anything. Except maybe some milk and eggs.<br />
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I know I have enough stuff to make bread and oats for a while, I just need to do it. ;)<br />
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Yesterday was the first day of this and here is what we had:<br />
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Breakfast: Pumpkin oatmeal with raisins<br />
Lunch: Pb and J in tortilla with side of raw carrots<br />
Supper: Got brought to us from friend, a pork chop casserole that was FANTASTIC!!!! :D<br />
Snack: Graham crackers<br />
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Today the 2nd:<br />
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Breakfast: Blueberry oatmeal<br />
Lunch: Veggie Romaine Lettuce leafs with half an orange and a few pretzels<br />
Supper: Leftover Enchilada Casserole over rice<br />
Snack: Popcorn<br />
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<b>Pumpkin Oatmeal</b><br />
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As much oats as you need, I don't measure anymore bc I just dump, I know how much my kids eat. ;)<b> </b><br />
Pumpkin (canned)<br />
Cinnamon<br />
Milk (or water)<br />
Raisins<br />
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Dump your oats, pumpkin, cinnamon, milk or water, and raisins in pot and cook until desired doneness. ;) I did drizzle some honey on top in the kids bowls. ;)<br />
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<b>Blueberry Oatmeal</b><br />
<br />
As much oats as you need<br />
Can of blueberry pie filling<br />
Can of evaporated milk<br />
Cinnamon<br />
More milk or water<br />
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<br />Dump everything in pot and cook until done! I did take 2 bananas and split it between the 6 kids.<br />
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I don't know why I had blueberry pie filling b/c I don't normally buy it with the corn syrup in it. I still have one more can to use! I also have a TON of evaporated milk and sweetened condense milk. Curt did laugh at me about how much we have, but I know I bought them when they were about .25 a can at Aldis... Can't pass that price up and I knew I would use them... but I haven't used them as fast as I thought... <br />
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Will post again tomorrow with the menu! :)Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-70167047081799047072013-04-30T23:49:00.002-04:002013-05-01T00:00:12.631-04:00Remember Me? :)Wow! I really wanted to post much sooner than this, but life around here is slightly crazy! And I honestly don't think I would have it any other way! There just isn't a whole lot of time to sit and post a blog... But my hubs is away overnight for work, and the kids are in bed, and I really need to update! :)<br />
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The kids had CI (cochlear implant) surgery on Wednesday, April 24th at Children's Hospital in DC. Ella's surgery was schedule for 7:30am and had to be there at 5:45am. She was having both ears done, and XJ was having his (what we were told til right before they took Ella, but they did his left) right ear done.<br />
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My mom had planned on taking vacation this week even before fully finding out the date, and it just worked out that it was the same week! :D Thankful oh so much she was here!<br />
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She got here Tuesday, and then we left about 4:15am to head to DC with XJ and Ella. The whole time there XJ was all smiles and not a care in the world! He is so trusting! While Ella, confused as to WHY I woke her when it was still dark, with only her and XJ, mom and dad and a backpack. i could only think of the things she was thinking, she was clearly not too happy and very worried, UNTIL we pulled into the parking garage at DC, where she recognized the Bear on the garage. Only then did she FINALLY smile at me and was ok! I kept turning around and smiling at her in the van, but she wouldn't really smile back. I kept thinking, did they leave when it was dark from her foster care home before coming to where we got her? What was she thinking?<br />
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Pulled in and got a spot VERY easy b/c no one was there! Got registered and had to wait a bit. Then they called them both back and had to get them undressed except for undies. Trying to explain that the ties go in the back was quite fun! HAHA!!! Talking to the nurses there getting their vitals and asking us questions about history, we got to tell them we have only had them for 7 months, then yes we do have other kids at home, yes, we have SIX kids total! :) Curt was showing them our Easter pic! They of course had to tell everyone who walked by! I guess it was also VERY unusual to have a 2 kids from the same family go through the surgery at the same time.... :)<br />
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Finally got to the time where it was time for her to go back. I was still doing ok at this point. :) The anesthesiologist asked if we wanted to give her some "sleepy" drink to calm her more so they could take her back and both Curt and I looked at each other like, uh.. I don't think so...? So he said well let me see if she will let me pick her up. And she went to him ok, so it was all good. So come time to take her back he took her and let me kiss her, and I signed I will see you in a minute ok? I love you! Gave her a kiss. The whole time I'm smiling hoping I'm not worrying her anymore than what she is! Then daddy gave her a kiss and off they walked. She looked a little worried but she didn't make a fuss or noise. <br />
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Christina works at Childrens and happened to be working same time we were there, so she popped in to say hi for a few before she got back to work! So nice to see a face we knew! :)<br />
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XJ did GREAT at waiting! This poor kid has had absolutely NOTHING to eat or drink since 8 pm the night before! Dr told us he would prob be done around 11:00-11:30 and then he said noon, so we weren't 100% sure! But come 1:30 and I was like they should be done. At this point XJ is starving, I know he is bc I was, and I knew he was thirsty! Finally Dr came around 1:15ish and said it took about an hour longer b/c they were on the phone with the Cochlear America. Her left ear was great no probs and tested fine, but after they had sown up her right ear, and tested her, it wasn't testing fully. I don't remember everything he said, but something about the electrodes, and I'm prob WAY off on that.... BUT CA and Dr were 99% sure it was nothing, and Curt said if it doesn't work...? Dr reply, we go back in and replace it, the inner piece is guaranteed for 10 yrs. Curt and I both were thinking, but do you do it for free if you have to go back in? ;)<br />
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I got to go back to recovery while Curt sat and waited for XJ to go back.<br />
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I got back to recovery and nothing could prepare me. I tried to brace myself, I knew it was surgery, I knew it was on the ear, I knew they would be taking a drill to her cochlea, I knew she would be in pain, I knew she wouldn't understand what I just let the doc do, I just didn't fully know how bad it would hit me.<br />
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She was thrashing all over and the 2 nurses asked if she slept like that and I said no. I put my stuff down and went by her head that way she would see me when she fully woke up. She was drugged, it was pretty obvious, a little more than I expected. Finally she woke up and wasn't too happy. She started crying and I tried to console her the best I could. finally they gave her another shot of morphine... She tried to move her arm even more b/c she could feel it going in her IV. Finally after a few minutes they asked if she likes to be held and I said yes, can I hold her. So they got her wires and I picked her up and sat in the chair. She was still not happy, and nurse gave her another shot of morphine to try and calm her down. Then Curt came in.<br />
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Nothing could prepare me. I did think, "What the hell did I just do to her?!" (yes I did think hell.. but it's the only time I thought it in those exact words...) Just all the pain she was in... Nothing will prepare you for that. Pain of your child, and nothing you can do to help her... But as suddenly as I thought that, it left. A peace came over me.<br />
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The nurse asked if she would want a Popsicle. And of course that cheered her up a bit. Poor thing tried to lift her head and couldn't. She was tipsy, quite tipsy. So she just chilled and ate an orange popsicle. As she was eating it, I could feel ALLLL color drain from my face and I was praying, Dear God, I can NOT pass out! PLEASE give me the strength I need! Curt took one look at me and asked if I was ok, and I shook my head no. The nurse asked if I needed some water, then she asked if I ate anything. Um, no, I couldn't even if I wanted too, but I knew I needed to get some sugar in me. I remembered I had a granola bar in my bag and I ate that while she went and got me some water. A few minutes later my color was coming back... Then Curt so lovingly started laughing at me b/c "I" was the one who was getting light headed! I laughed and said yeah yeah yeah... But it all came up on me. Ella in pain, Satan putting those doubts in my head of you didn't do the right thing, and 2 shots of morphine, then seeing Curt finally... Oy...<br />
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Pastor BJ stopped by and visited for a few minutes and then prayed for us. Can't even begin to tell you how much that meant to us. We've never had a pastor visit us when we've been in the hospital... <br />
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We were trying to figure if we could sneak away to see Pastor and Angela and their girls, but there was just no way we could escape and they were trying to do the same! We both were a tad busy with our kids! :) <br />
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I had to hold her a few different times, and then put her in bed, and then hold her again... But she started getting sick. The 1st time she did, it was orange and red.. I thought ok, she had breathing tube in her and her tummy was pumped twice, that's why the blood. I didn't worry too much. The next time it was more, and all red. Alot. I was a bit worried but didn't show it, then the nurse showed about 4-5 other nurses and I was like ok, this can't be that good right? They say they all in all they gave her 3 different "no more puking meds" but I think it was 4...? I dunno, it was alot. Finally after the last one around 7, it worked. She kept her liquids in her and around 8:30 I asked the nurse if she could have some Tylenol to her with her pain. She was afraid to give her anything, and I was kinda too, but she needed something. She did give her some and she kept it in her and slept pretty good.<br />
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By this time XJ had come back and b/c I was holding Ella, Curt was dealing with him. He didn't want to wake up. But I can't say I can't blame the poor kid, not enough sleep and not enough to eat. he was beat! He also had to have some help breathing b/c he didn't want too. Plus they had to hold his chin shut. I didn't fully hear everything and I honestly didn't want too. I knew what I just went through with Ella and didn't know that I had strength to do it all over with XJ. And the fact that I heard, not breathing on his own... I looked at Curt and he kept telling me he was ok and just fine. Just the way his neck and chubby cheeks are that they needed to keep his mouth closed... Curt can explain it better, but that's the jist. :)<br />
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XJ finally woke up and spit his breathing tube out and then went right back to sleep. The nurse closely watched him for a good long while...<br />
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Oh, when they were bringing him in, they asked if I wanted to have the curtain closed since he was in the room next to Ella. I said that prob would be wise til he was awake and alert... Well, Ella saw him, and she got a small smile in her eyes and said XJ. I said yes, XJ. :)<br />
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We thankfully had the same room, each room has 2 bed in it.. closed off by a curtain, and it was looking like we wouldn't get the ones next to each other, let alone Curt being able to stay. SO.... They each had a different nurse so they didn't get things mixed up and that way Curt could stay too. We also didn't know how long we were supposed to be there, but it was 23 hours... I was ready to go home, but honestly thankful that Ella was there as long as she was, same with XJ.<br />
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The nurses were great there! I didn't get much sleep, b/c of course when it was time to sleep, they would be waking up and starting to need to go to the bathroom... Peeing in a bed pan and a jug... so fun! :)<br />
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About midnight they both were perky enough, and Ella looks at him and smiles and waves! He waves back, so then she said I love you, he replied with I love you. Then she holds up her IV hand and he does the same. XJ then pointed to his ear, and then to her, and she signed yes. Then they both passed out asleep.... It was a long night, I am not going to lie, but it was good too.<br />
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We got discharged around 8. Doc came and looked at Ella and her ear muffs, which is NOT the medical term. Infact I have NO idea HOW they came up with the medical term for these things... Hers was good, then he did XJ's. The kids got a certificate about being good patients, then 2 small toys, and off we went!<br />
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Had to hit Target on the way home for their antibiotic... I didn't want to take them in, but Ella had to go to the bathroom, so we went in.<br />
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The kids were happy and excited to be home and they all were happy to see each other! :)<br />
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Fast forward.... Monday they had a follow up... A bit frustrated with all that b/c I was told to call them for appointment. So I did on the way home from hospital on Thursday. Their computer wasn't booting up with the appointment page so she had my name and number and was going to call me back that day with a time. I said ok. Never got a call, so I called the number right away Friday morning... Ok, it was about 10ish... I got a machine, so I left a message, and tired to call a few other times, and left another message. I finally emailed our audiologist on our way out. My mom told Curt and I go out while we had a chance... ;) We still had 2 free movie tickets and then went to Genghis Grill. She emailed me and told me a time. I then got a time from the automated line on Saturday with a different time, then Sunday night Dr Reilly called me with yet another different time! I was like really? I just need to know what time to go in! hahaha!!! I called first thing Monday morning and was told it was the time on the automated call.<br />
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Got there, which I don't recommend going to Fairfax Children's, at.all. Dr Reilly came in and kept saying how well the surgery was, and again about Ellas ear, but was pretty confident that it would be working just fine! :) I sure hope so! He then said that we have such a beautiful family and the kids are so adorable, that he would like us to record their activation with our iPhone and give him a copy. He wants to use it as a study and then to show others how the CI really does benefit. He made it sound like he would want a few updates on how they are doing as well. Yes, he's seen the WHOLE family, and this is first time I didn't have all the kids with me! :)<br />
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Activation day is May 20th at 1pm. It could take up to 5 hours... SO will post as soon as I can that day. :) The reason they are waiting til then bc they need to let the swelling go down and they need to fully heal. With having a magnet in their head, and by placing the one on the outside, it could pull out if they weren't fully healed.<br />
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Ella does have some swelling on her left side, but he said that one was a bit lower than the right side. She could be swollen up to the time of activation, but not to worry. He said there is no infection, but to watch and make sure it didn't get red. He told me to put some cream on the stitches... So, after showers tonight I put that on.. Oy, that was fun. I told Curt and as I was telling him, I was thinking, I could've used a q-tip! Haha, oh well.... ;)<br />
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I have stopped giving them Tylenol.. I may give it to Ella just b/c the left side seems to be hurting her a bit, but that's just b/c it's still swollen. They are still on antibiotic for a few more days, and then this cream for the next 2 weeks, once a day. I did ask him if they could ride bikes, with their helmets, and he said absolutely! I wanted to jump up and hug him! HAHA!!! He said just watch them, but don't tell them no if they want to play like that! :) Guess what they will be doing tomorrow??? :)<br />
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I used to be in charge of the meals ministry with our church, but with knowing how many appointments are coming up, I knew I couldn't handle being in charge anymore. I felt bad for asking to step down b/c I signed on for a year, but just knew I couldn't fulfill my year. I asked someone else to take over and she agreed! :) She's doing an AWESOME job! She also got some meals lined up for us! I was floored. I kept saying I can do it, just provide a meal the day we get home. DeAnna had asked me if I needed anything, and Curt kept telling me to ask for meals. You know me, I am not going to ask. But I had a friend that was bringing it Friday night, so if we had something that day that way my mom didn't have to worry.... So DeAnna brought some supper for us Thursday. I also had gotten a text before surgery from Kristen asking about meals. I said fine. She said ok, we will do it for a week. I said no need, just do Thursday and Friday, and I'll be fine. Then I get we will do it for a week. I said fine. Then a few hours later I get another text saying that they will cover everyday for a week since we have a large family, and prob no leftovers! ;) I said, fine. She wrote back, haha, we won! So I of course said was there a bet going on that I wouldn't accept? She said well some didn't think you would! HAHA!!! I guess they know me too well.... ;)<br />
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I kept thinking, I got home from China and I got 3 meals, and I am SOOOO NOT complaining, b/c I was in charge, I didn't ask for more. It was ok and we survived, so I was like, I got through jet lag and adoption, I can do this.<br />
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But I am not going to lie. It's been a HUGE blessing! More than I can say! It's just SO hard for me to ask, let alone accept. BUT as we were talking in our small group and I've heard it before, don't let the blesser not be a blessing, you are taking that away from them. And more along those lines. Also about being disciples and making disciples. It all fit in, trust me! :) Also, how some people in our church, this is their ministry and how they aren't involved in anything else.<br />
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I've been blessed by my church family so much in these last few months! Yes, after we brought them home, but even more so since surgery. I'm just in shock that that many people wanted to cook for US! ;) Blessed more than I deserve!<br />
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Sunday after church my mom left, and since Curt was playing keys he wasn't home right away. Mom left, I fed the kids and got them down for their naps, and just laid on the couch. Curt got home a bit later and talked a bit, and then I just lost it. So he sat down and I just cried, off and on... Finally I was ok. Then I got a text saying to get some rest (after I was informed I was right on the gummy bears! haha!!!)... I lost it again... Curt drew a bubble bath and I cried the whole time I was in there! ;) It just all came down on me. Just feeling overwhelmed from surgery, to having the meals brought in.. just everything! Lack of sleep didn't help either... ;) At this point I still thought it was just a week of meals, but it slipped somehow at small group that night that I had meals every other night then til the 10th! So on my way to the doc office for follow up, I cried more. just overwhelmed with gratitude. Still couldn't believe that many wanted to cook for us... a pretty big family! ;)<br />
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I don't deserve these many blessings! I don't deserve anything! But God is gracious enough to bless me with my awesome hubs, my kids and my church family! Totally feeling supported through this all! :)<br />
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Praying that XJ's brain responds to the CI and he starts to understand noises and sounds and his brain doesn't shut them out or off. I'm honestly not too worried about Ella due to the fact that the hearing aides were working and she did hear us and other things. It will just now sound a bit differently. More computerized. ;)<br />
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Both Curt and I at one point said, why are doing this if the hearing aides are doing their job? Once she gets CI she won't be able to hear ANYTHING unless she has the CI on. BUT, she is losing her hearing and she can't fully hear everything with the aides. With the CI she will be able to hear all sounds!<br />
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I also thought too again later on Wednesday when the brought XJ into the room, why did I do them both at the same time? What was I thinking? But again, as soon as I thought it, it went away! I won't lie, I thought that about 5 different times, but each time, it went away just as quickly as it came and the last time I thought it, I got a peace. A peace that can only come from our awesome God!<br />
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XJ is doing GREAT and he was doing great with recovery while at hospital! Ella still every now and there is a bit mopy... But I really think it has to do with her one side still swelling.<br />
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Riding bikes tomorrow FOR SHORES!!!!<br />
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Thank you. Thank you all for your prayers and text/emails about how they are doing! It means ALOT! I'm seriously overwhelmed with gratitude and just don't know how to say thank you, and just how much it means to me! <3 br=""><!--3--></3>Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-16305133251198023082013-02-20T16:41:00.002-05:002013-02-20T16:41:16.948-05:00Much Needed UpdateJust a warning:<br />
If you plan on sticking with me to the end of this, get some tea, or coffee, or something.... You may need it... ;)<br />
<br />
I realized I never did sit down for an update about the last appointment we had... They had to see the audiologist and the speech pathologist. This appointment was Feb 6th. (here we are TWO WEEKS later!!!)<br />
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Curt had to be out of town for the week so I grabbed all kids and books and such and headed out for Children's in DC. While Kotah went with Ella with audiologist, I went with the others while the SP saw XJ. She asked me a few questions while he played and then she watched him and got some things out and asked him to play, or throw the ball, or take turns.. Which color ball do you want.. etc.... <br />
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Then it was time to switch. The SP had an interpreter come in. I'm still slightly confused as to WHY she had him come in. She knew sign... It's one of those, why didn't I ask when I was there?<br />
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Anyways, this SUPER tall guy comes in, and I felt slightly uncomfortable. Not sure why, but brushed it off. Ella would have NOTHING to do with him, didn't even acknowledge he was in the room, completely ignored him. She was not comfy with him at all. So the SP said, ok you can go. Again, I have no idea why he was there. But it's over. :)<br />
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So she asked the same questions, and did the same stuff with her as with XJ.<br />
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I told her the different between to the two are their learning styles, how quickly they learn and pick up, or how they don't pick up some things, etc... (This was before Ella came in...)<br />
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She then listed off this and that and I'm like whoa... Too.much.info.to.comprehend. ;)<br />
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She said, I know you homeschool and this may be hard for you to do, or to put them in a school, or understand, but XJ needs to be put into a school that is solely a deaf school so he has that one on one interaction, all the time. he also needs to be put into therapy to help with his fine motor skills b/c he signing is sloppy. Ella needs to be put into a school where there is sign language and talking so she can see and hear both.<br />
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Ok, in my head, you DO NOT tell me "this may be hard for me to understand or I may not want to do this". I didn't like her so much after that. I'll be honest. I've gotten enough negativity from people, I don't need it from a SP too. <br />
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So I very kindly and nicely said. Look, I've prayed for these guys since we got their referral. I prayed that God would give me direction on what to do with aides or CI. I will do anything in MY POWER to help these guys, and if that means putting them in a school, then I will. It doesn't matter that I homeschool, that doesn't mean I'm against putting them in a school. But I also have to consider my other kids, the time it will take, how far it is, and how much it will cost me.<br />
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Now back in my head slightly upset still, do NOT tell me how I will respond. You don't know me, you don't know my heart or my situation.<br />
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Then talking with the audiologist that day, I just felt off. Completely. Here I am told in the beginning that if these aides don't work, we need to move fast. Then when I ask when we need to see the doc to do the test for the CI, you are telling me you don't know how soon? Ugh, really. So this time I am getting completely mixed messages of the first few visits. Way to confuse a girl. ;)<br />
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I left that day not knowing when the next time I would get another appointment. As far as I knew, it would be a month from now. Which is fine, but please don't tell me we need to move fast if the aides don't work, then slow way down, or give me another story. Not cool.<br />
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I'm already at this point not sure that I want Ella to get the CI's. She hears fine with the aides, which I know she will lose all her hearing one day, and I do know that the sooner you get the aides, the better. I also know she isn't fully hearing all levels of hearing which is not helping her in her speaking, or soon to hopefully speak. Do I really want to put her through this all? What will she think when she's older? Why did mom and dad put her through this? What if she wants to be deaf? God help me. I'm confused. I need peace on this decision. At this time, Curt is at peace for both getting them. I was completely at peace for XJ getting them just to be aware of his surroundings. It's for his SAFETY that I mainly want them for him. He gets hit by shopping carts b/c people behind him don't know he is deaf, they think he is a little boy just playing around and not paying attention. Ok, so thats partly true, but add deafness to it as well. I want him to be able to hear his surroundings. I want him to hear his name too. I think this will benefit him to the GOOD. I fully feel at peace for going through getting one. He would only get one b/c we are wanting it to help him be aware of things. He may never talk, he will most likely always need sign language to communicate, and I'm TOTALLY ok with that. His age plays a big part in that as well. He hasn't heard anything in all his 6 yrs of life. He may not be able to form the words, and you know what? That's ok.<br />
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Ella, if insurance will cover, will get by-lateral CI. Which means, both ears. We could do one ear, and then go back for the other, BUT, she would favor one ear over the other, she wouldn't hear the sounds the same bc with the CI it sounds like KIT from Knight Rider.... (well, not exactly b/c things have improved since then, but you get the idea) ;) And surgery two times... :\<br />
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So needless to say, I left that appointment, mad, confused, and just hurt. I was seriously ready to chuck the hearing aides and be like whatever, I don't need this stress. They are learning sign and will just keep doing that and forget it.<br />
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I then get a call the next week by the audiologist saying she had an opening for them today. I was kinda reserved when she called. I was like oh ok. Then she said do you have any questions about anything? I said well, I was thinking there was something about XJ, but I don't remember what it was. She said ok, well, if you think of it, email or call me. Then I said, wait, remind me again why you are wanting Ella to have them now and why you are pushing them? So she explained it all. I just couldn't fully remember EVERYTHING, when talking to Curt about the visit. I said I think it's to help her hear all sounds and be able to talk better. And the fact that she is younger she will benefit better from it now than waiting til the aides don't work anymore. And she basically confirmed it, just using a few different words. ;) She then proceeded to say that we as professionals don't always remember that we don't discuss things very clearly. But I have noticed that when I don't, you do the thinking and researching and always come back with a good question. One that you can tell you thought about before asking. There are no "stupid" questions but you by far ask the most intelligent ones and it's obvious the way you are asking things. The first time I met you with all your kids I was thinking oh boy, but I look forward to our appointments. Your kids listen and are well behaved, and love that you are going through this as a family. The SP even mentioned how IMPRESSED she was with how much you understand your kids and how you know how each one learns and that not every one who is deaf learns the same way. She was very impressed with you and your kids. Our audiologist then said she was impressed with how well they;ve adjusted, and it's like they've been with us all long. <br />
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I then said something along the lines of thank you. Then something like, I just want to make sure I'm doing the right thing. I'm asking bc I don't fully process until the next day, or talking with my husband it hits me, like oh, um...? I said I'm not trying to get too "preachy" here, but I know that God placed them in our family for a reason.<br />
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She said some other things, but it's exactly what I need to here after that last lovely visit. So then I was ready and refreshed, but still not fully at peace with Ella and the CI.<br />
<br />
Then we had another appointment today where I had to take the CI questionnaire back in. That consisted of the gritty ?'s and how much we understood and all that other good stuff. Also felt like a few questions were the same, and really they were, just worded differently. Talk about brain dead about filling that out! ;)<br />
<br />
Not sure when it happened and I know I had some awesome friends praying for me, but am at peace with Ella getting the CI's.<br />
<br />
Did a few tests and talked about the CI, got to see one too! Man, it's AMAZING how far technology has come!!!! And the size of the piece that gets put into the cochlea... WOWzers... It's LITTLE!!!! Then She told me where the incision would be, where they drill the hole, the magnet that gets placed into the head and covered by the skin, then the ear piece and the piece that gets placed on top of the magnet. I asked, um, does the magnet ever make securitiy alarms go off? ;) She said not really, and they give you a card incase they would! ;) Nice huh? Also, if they would ever need an MRI, they surgically remove the magnet, do the MRI, then go back and place the magnet back in.<br />
<br />
This "should' last them their entire life. They could update it and get a newer version, but most insurances don't fully cover that. The only thing we should have to replace are the batteries. Easy enough right? ;)<br />
<br />
We also talked a little about "normal". I said I dis like that word. I said look at me and my family. We are SO not normal! I have 6 kids, 2 whom are deaf. Normal is just a setting on the dryer. She thought that was funny... She hadn't heard that... ;) anyways. I said, we've gotten negative comments about doing the CI. But this is NOT a decision that has been taken lightly. Infact, I struggled, ALOT, esp with Ella getting them. But I know that I am at peace, and that's what I asked for. I know that if we weren't supposed to be going through this, God would make it clear. But I don't see that. I want respect from my friends and family (and strangers would be nice, but that won't happen I'm sure) about the decision that Curt and i made for our family. You aren't in my family, you don't know what the best thing is for them and we truly believe this is the best decision for them. We aren't trying to "fix" them. We love them regardless of what is "wrong". None of my kids are "normal". We all have something wrong. God blessed us with each and everyone of them and He trusts us to make the right choices for them and to raise them. And we truly believe this is the right choice. Each one has their own opinion and that fine. But don't tell me I made the wrong choice. I'm not going to judge you for NOT getting an implant, or even a hearing aide. That's your choice, and that's fine. But I know with MUCH prayer this is what we are to do.<br />
<br />
So back home again, watching more signing dvds and going to keep learning! :) Regardless of how much they can hear, we will alawys still be using sign language bc they still need that. They aren't going to figure out what each word is and what it means, and voices. Everything that Ella has heard will sound differently. Surgery for ONE ear would be average of 3 hours, so two ears would be 6. Plus, they will do both kids at the same time. Recovery time, un known... They may even spend the night at hospital, but won't know all those details until we talk to doc. Which that appointment is unknown as of now.<br />
<br />
We have had a BLESSING at church! This week has been the seconds week that we've had an interrupter coming! The kids have responded very well to him, and the whole timing of that has been awesome to see! :) Just talking with Michelle at New Life and when Casey approached her, was about the same time we knew that Ella and Keegan were ours! :) His mom and dad are deaf, and his brother is as well. Anyways... It's been a blessing and so thankful for him and DeAnna allowing him to come and work!<br />
<br />
Also had MSD (Maryland School of the Deaf) come last week for the 1st time. They will be coming 2x a month to work with Ella, mainly bc she's under the age of 5, BUT they work with the WHOLE family! So each kid benefits from the lesson! They will only have paperwork for Ella though. Which is fine!<br />
<br />
My younger ones have taken a turn for learning lately.... Thad, XJ and Ella... need to find some more "work" for them! Working on colors with Ella and XJ.... The teacher from MSD said they may understand it before they can sign it. Which is proving to be true... Sometimes... ;)<br />
<br />
So that's where we are at right now. Told you it was long... Thanks for sticking with me to the end if you did! Thank you for all you prayers! We are still in the middle of this awesome journey!<br />
<br />
It truly is NEVER a dull moment in this house! :DSleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-25666349224397445322013-01-17T08:33:00.001-05:002013-01-17T08:36:20.933-05:00Brown Paper Bag DateIt's not what you think! :) brown paper bags are very useful! :)<br />
<br />
Last night while Curt was at his meeting I wrote down some serious and stupid and funny questions. I then included a king size Reese cups and king size twin bars. Yes, completely and totally healthy! ;)<br />
<br />
Anyways... It was just much needed no cell phone or computer time. It was late by the time he got home, but I managed to stay awake! Haha!!! :)<br />
<br />
We haven't had a date in a long time and while this isn't a get-out-of-the-house date... It is a date nonetheless. :) I told him I have a few more planned but will keep that a secret until I do them! Not sure if he's nervous about them or not? ;)<br />
<br />
You don't have to get all fancy to have some nice quiet quality time with your spouse! A little planning and a brown paper bag! Anything you can fit in there for a nice fun date! :) <br />
<br />
I did one where I grabbed a RedBox movie, a bag of microwave popcorn and some of his favorite candy. I wrote a note that said I promise to stay awake and off my phone. :) I think that was right before we left for China or right after we got home... I don't remember now... :)<br />
<br />
Anywho, give it a try! :)<br />
<br />
We sat and ate our candy and talked and asked questions! :) some of them we already knew, but that's ok! It is just the fact you are talking with nothing to interrupt! :)<br />
<br />
Here are a few questions I asked:<br />
<br />
What are your 5 favorite foods?<br />
What is one goal I can help you accomplish this year?<br />
What can I do to make you feel more loved?<br />
What can I do to make you feel more respected?<br />
What is your favorite book(s) of the Bible?<br />
What is your favorite Bible verse(s)?<br />
How would you describe me to someone who has never met me?<br />
<br />
These are just a few things I wrote down... :)<br />
<br />
<br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9AXIbiZEHNFoZMBtvaEMWplYyVCC7kZI0ffE6Tr2WupYuGa29kRRFLA6VRFzesBpVWvzDF6cXLk_Tx8pSw1eJSDavAJK67IgHih62mLXvVYljJRpBFiAFpyRzUGl9iQgkhtWwvePcO9c/s640/blogger-image--1430402066.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9AXIbiZEHNFoZMBtvaEMWplYyVCC7kZI0ffE6Tr2WupYuGa29kRRFLA6VRFzesBpVWvzDF6cXLk_Tx8pSw1eJSDavAJK67IgHih62mLXvVYljJRpBFiAFpyRzUGl9iQgkhtWwvePcO9c/s640/blogger-image--1430402066.jpg" /></a></div>Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-82556231113278618282013-01-09T21:54:00.001-05:002013-01-09T21:54:57.767-05:00This May Get Me in Trouble...Wow, if that didn't grab your attention... What a way to start a blog out, right?<br />
<br />
Well, my day was going like any typical Cecil day... Get up, breakfast, chores, schoolwork.. and mumble through math flash cards, realizing, I AM called to stay at home with my littles no matter how hard it is. My God blessed ME with these guys! Couldn't be more grateful! It's be a tiring and trying few days since I'm trying something new with their behavior... a REALLY good friend told me about it, and she even BOUGHT me the book and it showed up on my door TODAY!!! REALLY excited to give this a go, b/c even before reading the book, I started it.. Oy... That first day was NOT so much fun, but we are getting there... ;) Not that my kids were horrible beasts or anything, but needed some, well, lets say, improvement. Me being their mom needed some improvement on sticking to it, not that I didn't follow through... but ya know... ;) Seein it through no matter how tired I am.. But I will get on that on another blog once we've got this down... May take a bit, but will def blog about this book and how it's working later! :)<br />
<br />
Ok, so back to my day.... So I pop into Facebook and see something about 27 dead in a school shooting... Not just ANY school shooting, but an ELEMENTARY school shooting! I was like no way! So of course I pop over to google to see what I can find out...<br />
<br />
We have a tv, but can NOT get ANY channels, and I'm fine with that. ;)<br />
<br />
Sure enough, some one killed, innocent CHILDREN...<br />
<br />
But do you know what? Did you hear what happened in China today? Just about the same amount of people too. Did you know that? Yes, no one was killed, but injured.... got stabbed in their heads....<br />
<br />
Did you know that over 16,000 CHILDREN die a DAY from hunger? That equals to be ONE child EVERY FIVE SECONDS.<br />
<br />
Oh, well, hunger is different from cold blood shooting right?<br />
<br />
Yes, yes it is. But who's making a big deal about this?<br />
<br />
What about human trafficking? Lots of reports on this, but we are talking 300,000 CHILDREN a YEAR are taken... Do you know how many that equals to a day? Well, I'll be honest, my brain is very tired and I may have done it wrong, but if I did the math right, that's just over 833 a DAY....<br />
<br />
Oh, yes, human trafficking is different than some dude shooting in cold blood.<br />
<br />
Ok, what's orphans. Ya, you KNEW I was going there right?<br />
<br />
There are over 163 MILLION orphans in the world...<br />
<br />
Over 5,670 become an orphan a DAY...<br />
<br />
Approximately <b>250,000</b> children are adopted annually, but…<br />
Each year <b>14, 505, 000</b> children grow up as orphans and age out of the system by age sixteen<br />
Each day <b>38,493</b> orphans age out<br />
Every <b>2.2 seconds</b> another orphan ages out with no family to belong to and no place to call home<br />
<br />
Oh, yes, the world, not close enough to home is it?<br />
<br />
Ok, well, then let's move this closer to home, here in the UNITED STATES....<br />
<br />
Just over 300 MILLION here in the States.<br />
<br />
If only 7, SEVEN percent of Christians helped an orphan, there would be no more orphans.<br />
<br />
This number makes me sick.... There are 719 children awaiting in foster care to be adopted in the STATE OF MARYLAND and guess how many churches??? There are 5,816 churches in MARYLAND... what's wrong with that number? Don't live in Maryland? There's stats for every state...<br />
<br />
http://www.icareaboutorphans.org/WaitingKidsinYourState.aspx<br />
<br />
There are more churches than there are orphans in the US....<br />
<span id="RadDesigner1"><span class="SubText"></span></span><br />
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<br />
Yes, I understand that these children were not shot dead in their school...<br />
<br />
My point.<br />
In NO way shape or form am I trying to dismiss what happened today. Not at all. It's very sad and extremely SICKENING. My point is, Who's talking about the kids who die from starvation? Who;s talking about human trafficking? How old is your child? Can you picture (boy OR girl) your child stolen from you to be SOLD into slavery? What about the orphans? Who's talking about them? Did those kids who were born WANT to be an orphan? No, they didn't have a choice. Same goes for those children for human trafficking. They didn't CHOOSE to be a slave.<br />
<br />
We should NOT let a huge tragedy like this make us hug our kids more. That should be THE FIRST thing you want to do when you see them get off that school bus, or walk in the door, not just today, but EVERY DAY!!! I don't care what kind of day you had, or how rough it was with the kids. Hug them. I posted this, in a different language as my status tonight...<br />
Its sad that it takes a major tragedy to make you want to hug your kids tighter... shouldn't be that way.<br />
<br />
Like I said, this is a very touchy subject and I'm sure I'm gonna get it. But know I am not in any way shape or form trying to dismiss what happened, but what I want to know is, this gets huge media, as it should, but what about all these other kids who are hurting or dying? What's being done?<br />
<br />
God WILL use this for the good! I believe that everything happens for a reason and I don't like that this happened. It makes me sick. But kids dying from hunger makes me sick too.<br />
Kids taken for sex slaves, that makes me sick.<br />
Orphans, that makes me sick.<br />
<br />
We may never understand or fully get an answer to WHY this evil happened. Or why there is hunger, orphans and human trafficking, BUT I believe we CAN do SOMETHING! WE CAN make a difference! Good can and will arise from this! It's all in how we go on from here. We have to keep our eyes, ears, and hearts fixed on Him and ONLY Him. His wonderful love will continue to out-pour from His loving hands, and as long as we run to Him... He will give us the strength to go on. God has a plan! We just have to keep trusting Him. Know that He will bring good out of this! It is so sad and sickening this happened, but I know that He has a plan, and it is way better than you or I could ever think or imagine!<br />
<br />
My post earlier about homeschooling my kids... was NOT a put down on teachers, or parents that have to send their kids to school. I was simply being thankful for my job! I understand and know that you have to work there, or put them in a school, and I am in NO way bashing that! You do what God has called you to do. I am NOT judging you at all! This is what God has called me to do, and I'm glad! <br />
<br />
I hope she doesn't mind, but saw this quote on a friends page and wanted to share here....<br />
<br />
<h5 class="uiStreamMessage userContentWrapper" data-ft="{"type":1,"tn":"K"}">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><span class="userContent">"But the Lord renewed my strength, and carried me along, that I might see more of His power; yea, so much that I could never have thought of, had I not experienced it." -Mary Rowlandson</span></span></span></h5>
<h5 class="uiStreamMessage userContentWrapper" data-ft="{"type":1,"tn":"K"}">
<span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><span class="userContent"><span style="font-size: small;"> </span> <span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">God WILL use this for good.... Just keep praying and keep your all on and in Him! He really knows what He is doing....</span></span></span></span></h5>
<br />
There is evil everywhere we look... Yes the schools should be safe, but so should walking around a park, or the mall.. Or even your front yard.<br />
Truly cherish every moment you have with your loved ones and don't let a tragedy make you realize what you have...<br />
Just my thoughts...<br />
<br />
(P.S. the numbers aren't exactly on some... I couldn't find everything I was looking for and just went with I found on google... ;) Wrote this late at night on Dec18,2012)Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-75997118266867505262013-01-09T17:08:00.000-05:002013-01-09T17:08:06.824-05:00Let's Do this! (exercise)Ok, I'm gonna do it! :)<br />
<br />
I was doing so good with exercising and then December came, and went, and nothing. I could NOT get up early enough to do anything... Got up and did my devos and that was after the kids were up... I felt so good when I was up before them, did my devos, exercised and got in the shower.<br />
<br />
I had a kettle bell given to me and I used it faithfully and LOVED it! I was up to almost 200 swings... Now, I'm back at 100... :\ <br />
<br />
Life gets busy right? Well, yes it does, but I want to get back into shape. I want to eat right. I want to set the example to my kids. They know all about eating right and exercising, but it's harder when it's colder outside and can't get out and really play alot. And we do eat right, I fix all our meals, and am doing my best to stay away from cream of whatever soups, and other things that aren't healthy, but I do have to have a break every now and whip out something not so healthy, (like POISON DOGS!!! ;)) but for the most part, we eat healthy! We do not do juice drinks, or fruit snacks. I know, such a bad mom... But I'm telling you what! These guys act CRAZY when they get too much sugar!!! ;)<br />
<br />
Life is busy, but I can and I WILL set time aside to make sure I exercise again, EVERYDAY! I was able to do it for 2 months straight.... What happened?<br />
<br />
I make time for my deovs, I will just need to start setting my alarm and get up at 5:45 again!<br />
<br />
I feel so much better when I exercise, don't you? It really does give you more energy, you just have to GET UP! That's the hard part, but if I can do it, with 6 kids, homeschooling, I think you can! ;) So from here on out, I'm not going to miss a day, and yes, I'm posting this b/c I want to stay committed... again. ;) Like I said, i did it before, I so can do it again! It helps the day go better when I got up and got my things done and had breakfast ready, the day really did go smoother, we got school work done and felt more organized and accomplished! :)<br />
<br />
Today I did Zumba high insanity for 30 minutes, it was about 5 songs... and then before that I did 100 kettle bell swings and 15 pushups... Don't laugh... I'm starting all over again! ;)<br />
<br />
I know I have gained some weight through this whole adoption process, and yes, it's over and been over for a while.... (yes, you DO gain weight during an adoption, it's just like a pregnancy! ;)) and would honestly like to lose a few pounds and tone up. Build my muscles! ;) <br />
<br />
I don't always eat right b/c I'm so busy. Or sometimes I miss lunch, so then I snack all afternoon b/c I didn't eat lunch, or breakfast.<br />
<br />
So now, here's to eating a good breakfast... Even if I fix the kids oatmeal, BLECH, I will make sure I eat a small breakfast and eat lunch!<br />
<br />
I've even considered doing a detox for a month just to get rid of the yucky stuff and start fresh... Will see... Maybe one thing at a time? ;)<br />
<br />
So there's my exercising ramblings... ;)Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-77272948007087183252013-01-09T16:34:00.000-05:002013-01-09T16:34:21.706-05:00Office SpaceYes, I am talking about the movie. Have you seen it? In the beginning theres the guy jamming to some lovely music (not really....), and he gets in one lane because it's going faster, then that lane comes to a dead stop. So what does he do? He gets back into the other lane.<br />
<br />
It goes on like that for a little bit. Gets over to the "fast lane" b/c at the time it was faster.<br />
<br />
How many times have you done that? Come on, be honest. ;)<br />
<br />
How many times in your life have you tried to get in the fast lane, b/c your life and decisions weren't moving fast enough? Or, maybe you thought God wasn't moving fast enough so you go into the fast lane to make it move faster, ONLY to get STUCK in traffic and FORCED to slow down? Go ahead, be honest with yourself.<br />
<br />
There are a few times where I know i tried to take the lead b/c I thought God wasn't going fast enough for me, but in the end, I got forced to slow down. ALOT. In the end, I KNEW His way and timing is PERFECT, but thought my way was better. HAHAHA, guess what? It isn't!<br />
<br />
It doesn't matter how fast or slow things are moving. As long as you are letting God lead and guide you, it will all be ok! God wants us to go to Him and TRUST Him FULLY, not 99.9999999%, but all full 100%!<br />
<br />
Do you trust Him FULLY 100% with your all? Or are you moving into the fast lane on your own?<br />
<br /> It may be time to stop yourself and turn it all over to Him. Let Him guide you to the fast lane when He's good and ready to take you there.<br />
<br />
Psalms 48:14<br />
For that is what God is like.<br />
He is our God forever and ever,<br />
and he will guide us until we die.<br />
<br />
Psalms 32:8,9<br />
The Lord says, "I will guide you along the best pathway for your life,<br />
I will advise you and watch over you.<br />
Do not be like the senseless horse or mule<br />
that needs a bit and bridle to keep it under control." <br />
<br />Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5679585152030416693.post-41429711522756338992013-01-09T16:18:00.003-05:002013-01-09T16:18:23.725-05:00HEARING AIDESI'm soooo BEHIND in posting!! Its like catch up day! ;) taking the time to post a few... ;) So sorry with the bomb shell of 4 blogs here in a row... ;)<br />
<br />
So Monday, Dec 31, 2012 we left just after 11 to head to DC to get their hearing aides.<br />
<br />
Curt and I were talking on the way up how each other were feeling... I can't speak for him, but me, I had NO clue! This was THE day we had been praying for and had NO clue what to expect! Read all kinds of things of how they could respond and talked to others as well... So it really was up in the air! I was just gonna go with the flow. ;)<br />
<br />
We got there a little early, but we got right in. We were at the Scottish Rite Center in DC. The place is awesome, quiet and have gotten in and out right away, no waiting! :)<br />
<br />
We got to the room upstairs and she said she wanted to test their hearing again, esp Ella since it had been since Oct. She has something called an Enlarged Vestibular Aqueducts. In English that means she did have hearing and it's gotten worse. Infact it will get worse, so much so that the hearing aides won't work. So we take into consideration if the hearing aides work for now, do we do the surgery, does the "team" (team= Dr Reilly, and audiologists) think it will benefit, and how much will insurance cover, etc, etc, etc... So really that's not an option for now b/c we are trying the hearing aides.<br />
<br />
Keegan was tested again as well, and basically his hearing aide is as loud as it will go. There is no more room for it to get louder, she programed it that way. Most hearing aides have a volume control on them, but with kids, they don't do that. They program it to where it needs to be and go from there.<br />
<br />
Typically they do a "trial" period of 6 months with the aides, but as she said we need to move quicker b/c of their age. Esp Keegan who is 6. He will most likely need to use sign language to communicate. Again, we will sit down with the team and discuss whether the cochlear implant would be an option and good option for him.<br />
<br />
The audiologist said we live in a hearing world, and being deaf is hard. Not impossible, but we want to do want we can to help them. (her words)<br />
<br />
We go back Feb 6th to Childrens. We see the speech pathologist, and then will see what's next. She told me they want to move faster than the normal 6 months, but not too fast for us. She wants us to be comfortable in all the decisions.<br />
<br />
So back to the appointment....<br />
<br />
She did Ella first. She did the hearing test, we talked about this and this and how this and that works, etc... I sat in a chair and had her in my lap and she hooked the aides up the computer. Then put them in her ear, and then after a while she said ok Ella, can you hear me? And then she said where's momma? So I said Hello Ella, I love you.<br />
<br />
She just turned her head and smiled! she heard me! She heard me speak the full sentence, and not just a word or part of word! I was about in tears! ;) (we have video of both Ella and Keegan, it's on youtube and my face book page...)<br />
<br />
So she tested a bit more and talked some more and she was just looking around trying to figure out whos voice belonged to who! ;)<br />
<br />
Then she went to Curt and then it was Keegans turn! He was SOOOO hyper and giddy that day! Its like he knew something was up, and he was jsut very energic! More than normal! ;)<br />
<br />
He wouldn't sit still.. then finally it was his turn and she hooked the aides up to the computer and then put them in his ear. She said we will prob hear feed back from his b/c of the volume and now loud they are. Which is true.<br />
<br />
He prob wouldn't be able to have an implant in his left ear due to some "abnormality"... She didn't have the specific term b/c she couldn't read the medical term. She didn't make it sound like it was anything to worry about either. So I don't know.<br />
<br />
He got his turned on and since it's been 6 years for him to hear anything, his brain doesn't know how to react. He just now turns his head at noises, but they have to be loud enough. I don't know how much he really is hearing and understanding. But it isn't going to happen over night!<br />
<br />
Just praying that God guides in the right direction and what to do next. I don't know if will do the implants on either one of the kids. But I do know that we are praying for what God wants us to do. We will do what we think is best for the kids, and if implants is the way to go, then we will. But it is NOT a decision we will be taking lightly. <br />
<br />
We left the office and headed home. We made it 5 minutes out and Ella was shutting her eyes, I was like, wow, she's going to go to sleep with them in and hearing all the noises! I put a movie in for kids just to keep them a little more quiet on the way home. ;) I don't normally put a movie in unless we are going someplace far! So it was a special treat! ;) We were hearing alot of feedback with Ella's aides b/c of where her headrest is on her car seat. So I turned around when we were in a tunnel and took them out... Then she was awake and bright eyed. It didn't dawn on me right away that she was trying to shut out the noise by closing her eyes... Didn't quite work.<br />
<br />
Then we made it to right before Brandywine and Keegan was starting to cry. He was "sleeping" for the last 20 minutes, which is NOT Keegan. he does NOT sleep in the car, doesn't matter how tired he is, he just doesn't! So the fact that his eyes were closed and he wasn't moving, I was like wow....<br />
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Then when he started crying we knew it was the aides. it was enough for now. So Curt pulled into the Aldis parking lot and popped them out. As soon as they were out, he was smiling and ok and wide awake! Then it dawned on me that both of them heard things they weren't used to so, closed their eyes to shut it all out!<br />
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We got home, ate the supper i had ready, thankfully! I was soo exhausted that cooking dinner was NOT on my mind! So thankful I had time to put it in the crock pot AND turned it on! BONUS points there! ;)<br />
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After supper we decided to try them again for a bit and they saw me grab them and smiled and was ready for them to be put in! So that's good right? ;)<br />
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It's been just over a week with the aides and they are ok with having them in. They haven't fussed or asked to have them out. There are times I forget to put them back in after naps... But trying!<br />
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Like I said, Keegan's brain doesn't fully understand he needs to respond to the noises. His brain is on overload. It will take him a little longer to fully realize what's going on. Also with his age b/c he is older. But I know that God has a plan and I trust Him fully with whatever needs to happen!<br />
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Ella has tried to say FOX. I had Kotah's language box sitting on my lap and there was a picture of a fox and she looked at me like what's the sign? Me, I don't know the sign, but it's a FOX. So she said FO, I said yes, good job, FOX, so she said FO again! And smiled! She heard me and tried to repeat me! She hasn't really tried to repeat us on any other words just yet... But not pushing. Just trying to sign and talk at the same time and get them to understand a bit more!<br />
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So that's it for the hearing aides for now... just basically taking a day at a time, which is what I've been doing! ;)Sleep, what's that???http://www.blogger.com/profile/07106565958352475985noreply@blogger.com0